Blog - 8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

Please Don't Try To Be Happy

5/7/2019

Has anyone ever said “Smile. Be happy!” to you? Did that work… or did it have the opposite effect?

You can’t force yourself to be happy or have a positive outlook, to flip the switch with one feld swoop from Off to On. Positivity is a state of being that’s cultivated, one that’s developed by consistently strengthening your skillful perception of events and emotionally accepting experiences.

Positivity isn’t always easy to access. When you’re feeling depressed, shaky, afraid, angry or worried, positive emotions like happiness, joy, and love can feel like too big of a leap. Instead of feeling bad that you can’t connect to these deep heart emotions, I offer that it’s much easier (and more realistic) to bring in a renewing feeling, one that's a little lighter and more accessible.

For instance, a renewing emotion / feeling sense can arise when you notice the warmth of the sun on your face, listen to birds chirping in the trees, feel the coolness the breath as it comes into your body, or tap into small place of ease somewhere in your realm.

Renewing emotions can be the gift that fills the gap between “negative” and “positive” emotions. They can have you feeling less guilty and shameful for not be so happy all the time…which is actually not a realistic or practical state.

Psychology researcher Barbara Frederickson has actually shown that a 3:1 ratio of positivity to negativity sustains us and keeps life moving in the right direction. Too much is fake (sincerity counts) and not enough keeps us cycling into gloom.

So access those positive emotions if you can but stop trying so hard. It's too much pressure. Instead, turn to renewing more often. What feels grounded and good. What’s a bridge between low and high? What gives you a little lift instead of keeping you down? Renewing emotions and feelings will benefit you greatly and keep you far from depleting states without the “Smile. Be happy!” BS.

What are you feeding your field?

4/23/2019

Every beat of our heart generates electricity (this is why the machine used to monitor our heart is called an electrocardiogram). Whenever electricity is produced, it also creates a magnetic field. Just like with the radio-frequency waves produced by cell phones, these electromagnetic fields transmit encoded information, i.e. my text message shows up thousands of miles away, exactly as I sent. Magnetic fields are transmitters of information.

I’m sure you’ve had the experience of walking into a room and feeling like something was off, even though there weren’t any obvious signals for that. You felt it… then verified it after talking to the person. Conversely, there may be a person in your life that you just naturally gravitate towards, that has you feeling good simply be being in their presence.

We pick up on each other’s energies, known and unknown.

The heart produces the largest source of rhythmic electromagnetic energy in the body, creating a magnetic field that is measurable at least 3 feet away. The brain’s magnetic field, on the other hand, can only be measured 1 inch away. This isn’t to say that the brain is bad but instead to ask us to start thinking more about what’s in our heart. The heart’s magnetic field creates your personal field environment.

Emotions are the driver of our physiology. What we feel - coherence or incoherence - can be seen in the rhythmic patterns of the heart. As a matter of fact, scientists can determine a person’s emotional state with 75% accuracy by simply analyzing the heart’s rhythmic patterns. Way cool!!

So if, through the heart, our emotions create encoded patterns in our magnetic field, what might you be feeding your field environment? What impact do you want to have on the people and places around you? What energies are you producing underneath that smile that might be a bigger truth of your situation?

With mindfulness, you can become more aware and love yourself no matter what so tune in. Check your heart out. Listen deeply. And then make choices based on what’s best with lots of care and love. And keep asking yourself, “What am I feeding my field right now?”

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

April 19th, 2019

4/19/2019

I love that meditation has become so popular and more widely accepted over the past dozen years - sort of like yoga did a few decades ago. And with this popularity comes technology. Nearly everything these days is touched by technology. Should this also apply to meditation?

Chill, Sit Breathe Think, 10% Happier, Headspace, Insight Timer, Calm,… so many apps. What to do about them? Which one to choose?

As I shared with my current Mindfulness & Meditation class, meditation apps serve a purpose but they are far from the end-all-be-all. They are a great on-the-go source of guidance into meditation, especially if you’re in a funk and having a hard time adjusting yourself to calm on your own. Taking a mini meditation break through the day, adding some guided visualization of instructed embodiment, is also good.

Meditation apps are a great tool - like a cooking class instructor. To cook a great meal on your own, though, is really your end goal. Yes, become familiar with the basic ingredients and try different techniques on for taste but then you’ve got to go on your own and cook your own meal.

Meditation is about becoming authentically aware and awake to your life. It’s spending time getting to know and being your best friend. If someone’s guiding you all the time, you miss out on your particular path, pieces that you wouldn’t otherwise recognize or come in contact with amidst the guidance. The quiet of the mind and the opening of the heart comes from developing a personal relationship with yourself. Sitting on your cushion or chair, how can you know yourself more deeply, get comfortable with difficulty, bring acceptance to that which you don’t like, appreciate those things you love even more? How can you enjoy just Being you?

What happens on the cushion / seat is a microcosm of what happens in your life. If open and accepting presence are what you’re developing in meditation, this translates to the same in your day to day interactions.

Getting to know your best friend doesn’t happen with depth if someone else is whispering in your ear. Sure, it’s great to have supportive connections but true personal health and wellness comes from you doing the work. But not to worry… it’s OK to sprinkle the spice of the apps into your meal. Just don’t make them your primary ingredient.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

Where Did The Time Go?

1/9/2019

It’s the beginning of the new year, a time of traditional look-back at accomplishments and forward-look to set new goals. Part of that reflective process always seems to highlight time, wondering where the year has gone. In sync with one of the most popular complaints of “too much to do, not enough time” comes “If I only had more time to do everything I wanted to do.”

I’m going to wave a flag, though, and say that you (meaning all of us) actually waste a lot of time everyday. No, I’m not talking about when you’re relaxing or sleeping - those are vital to health. I’m talking about when you spend time rehashing a conversation from hours ago, worry about what hasn’t happened yet (and most likely never will), or finish something in a rush only to have to spend 3X more time re-working it later. Even the distracted or multi-tasking mind mode shortens your available time. Studies have shown you’re not fully present 47% of the time on any given day. All of these are significant time drains and can perpetuate emotional tension.

So how to get some time back without a Back To The Future moment?

Pulling in your mindfulness practice, of course, and doing a HeartMath® technique called Freeze Frame… where you’re actually freezing the frame of the situation and making adjustments, just like you would if you were the director of a movie (hint, hint - you are directing your own movie all the time). Here's how to do it:

When you notice things are going astray, pause the movie.
Slow down and stop.
Bring your attention to your heart center, slow your breath, and make a sincere effort to activate a positive feeling (ease, patience, flow, appreciation, etc.)
Breathe and stay with this feeling sense as long as you need to or have time for. Even 10 seconds can be enough.
Next, being the director, what clip would you have coming next in your movie? What would be an effective attitude or step forward right now? Most likely you’ll come up with something that creates a pleasant ending and keeps things on track.

Freeze Frame gets you to your priority center much easier and quicker, saving you lots of course-correction time and energy. It also helps you save face, keeps relationships positive, builds flow into work projects, and has you staying with what’s really important. What a time and energy saver!

More about Freeze Frame and other time and energy saving techniques in the upcoming Start With Heart course, but for now, as you head into 2019, practice “freezing the frame” throughout the day. There are so many instances where this can add lots of benefit and it’ll surely start the year off saving some time.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

Simple, Easy Grace

11/19/2018

As you sit with friends and family around the Thanksgiving table this Thursday, most likely it will begin with a grace of some sort; a recitation of a prayer, a gratitude for the food and friends, a heartfelt recognition of all that you've been blessed with, even if it's only this plateful of food.

Saying grace before a meal has been a long-standing practice for most families although, to be honest, many have strayed since the invention of the TV dinner. If it's been missing at your table, perhaps it's a great time to make it a regular part of your meal process, just like setting the table and serving the food.

Saying grace and offering blessings doesn't have to be a religious act but simply an expression of gratitude and appreciation. So many conditions have come together for the food to be on your plate - not just the cooking and shopping but all the work that the farmer did, the earth, the sky and the sun. When you look deeply, there’s a great fortune there.

Eating the food provides nutrients and minerals, essential components of energy for your body to do you all the miraculous things you do. You're fueling your tank. Make it healthy, non-GMO food for super power.

You can also continue the appreciation for the food by eating slowly and with curiosity. Really experience what’s there. What does this really taste like? How do the textures change? Can you feel your body receiving the food, noticing fullness approaching?

This mindful view of your food, with grace and appreciation at the beginning, during, and end, can add a wonderful dynamic to your relationship with your plate and how you're truly fed. Perhaps re-initiate an offering of grace at meal time. Make it a regular practice for a week or so and see how this mindful ingredient adds lots of flavor and spice to an otherwise standard experience.

Love and Peace to you,
Shanti

Music Makes It More Than Fine

11/12/2018

Did you ever have a really rotten day and, on your way home, you slip in a CD of your favorite tunes and "crank it up to crank it out"? Within minutes of singing out loud, drumming on the steering wheel, grooving in your seat, and whatever else moves you, all your stress goes away. "Bye-bye mess back at the office! I've got boogie in my bones." Yes!!

Music has such capacity to change our mood and switch our outlook... and all within seconds. How fantastic is that!

For as long as I can remember, I've had native flute music playing in the background as I work in my office. One particular CD was always dialed in... over and over. I never got sick of it. I wasn't really paying attention to the music itself but it was there, creating a soothing space as I went about my day.

Then one day, the CD portion of my Bose system broke. Total bummer. (really sad face)

After a few days, I noticed an interesting thing. There was an edge to my energy. I was a bit more easily agitated and frustrated for really no reason at all... except the calming melodies enveloping my background space were no longer there.

Unfortunately my Bose system is still broken (and if anyone has one and never uses the CD portion, I'm happy to compensate and trade with you) with my work-around now being listening to this music on my iTunes. Edges be gone!

This week, experiment yourself and try different music on. Notice how different styles of music affect your mood; which ones act as mood stabilizers or energizers. This can be a fun thing to do, especially as holiday music is beginning to be pumped into the airways. You want decide what you want to listen to.

Peace to you,
Shanti

P.S. Lyrics to "More Than Fine" by Switchfoot... a favorite song to start the day and a powerful proclamation that I'm in charge of my life. When I wake in the morning
I want to blow it into pieces
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

When I'm up with the sunrise
I want more than just blue skies
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now
I'm not giving up, giving up, not backing down
More than fine, more than bent on getting by
More than fine, more than just ok

When I'm lit with the sunshine
I want more than just a good time
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now
I'm not giving up, giving up, I'm not selling out
More than fine, more than bent on getting by
More than fine, more than just ok...

How Wide Does Your Pendulum Swing?

9/22/2018

A pendulum swings wide and equal to each side. Drifting from the core center, a tremendous amount of energy can be expended when we are at either extreme. And while momentum can keep things going in either direction, symbolically, extremes can be dangerous… at the very least highly disruptive.

The Middle Way, balance in all things, helps to regulate energies and create ease and harmony. There is a smooth continuum when we swing not far from our center point. The energy that we use to produce results is directed and efficient as we're not engaged in the struggle of opposites and discursiveness in getting things done, rambling from one course to another. This is true for all aspects of our life.

Take your relationship with food, for example. If you're in balance, you’ll eat when your body tells you it’s time to eat (not by the clock), when you receive signals that more energy is needed. In this way, you’ll more easily maintain health. To do otherwise is to waste lots of energy eating too much, too little, or the wrong foods. Maintaining this balance, this Middle Way, with food is key to success and happiness.

As the energy of summer starts to wind down, you may notice a tendency to speed up in anticipation and preparation for winter: house projects saying "Now or never!", harvest collection, outdoor fairs and fun, catching up with summer events that were missed. There's a rush to complete and a not-so-subtle energy of extreme. While this vibrant energy can feel fantastic and have you feeling alive, it can also put you in overdrive and have your pendulum swinging wide, keeping you out of balance.

So as the next month of serious change takes shape, as best you can, try to avoid the rush-to-complete energy, the one that adds pressure to what could otherwise be an enjoyable situation. Instead, let yourself enjoy the transition that’s naturally coming with the change of season. Sleep late (easy to do with the delayed sunrise), stroll the garden often to notice the changes happening daily, breathe deep and often, and giggle in amusement as you change your clothes for the third time in one day trying to get it "just right" with the changing weather conditions. Stay centered and balanced in the Middle Way, enjoying your gentle pendulum swing.

Peace,
Shanti

Too Much Focus... Or Is It Just Lack Of Attention?

9/14/2018

Twice a day my dog Suki and I take a walk... exercise for me and release for her. For 18 and 3.5 years respectively it’s been the same route through the neighborhood. With such regularity, it’s really easy to get into “the zone”… Mommy and dog synchronizing steps and getting their groove on, at least until there’s something really exciting to sniff or stopping because it's time “to go”.

Last week was no different… until it happened.

Moseying along the other morning, the end of our 2.5 mile walk, with me looking forward to my second cup of coffee as I caught sight of our house, a sudden and jolting squish, squish!! Uck! All six of our feet instantly and completely submerged, sneakers soaked through to the socks, back of legs splattered, furry paws covered in this grey gritty matter… concrete.

WTH! Where did this come from?!

You see, the neighborhood has been going through a redevelopment since mid spring: roads ripped down to bare bones, sidewalks demolished or created (we have a lot of non-sidewalk areas), drainage systems removed and replaced, curbs being added where there were once none. Gigantic pieces of roadway equipment are spewed about everywhere, filling the streets like special edition Tonka trucks that a giant alien child forgot to put away.

For weeks, a little box has been laid out at my street corner: a wooden frame surrounding a shallow pit Suki could hop in and out of like a pony in a jumping competition. Granted, a big orange cone stood in front of it to warn passerbys of the work-in-progress but the area itself was empty and, after a few weeks, navigation became a habit.

On this particular morning, unbeknownst to us when we left the house, the worker-dude had just enough time to come by and fill this area with fresh, warm concrete. Being deeply focused in my walking zone, we charged right through into what we expected was an empty pit, not a mucky mess. The gritty splatter woke us up. What a mess we made.

All of this is a perfect example of how easy it is to concentrate so deeply on one thing that you become oblivious to the messages of change around you. Even with activities or attitudes that are beneficial, it's important to pull your head up every now and again to reassess and evaluate. Whether it's a work project that you're managing or a love relationship you're in, don't assume that things around you remain the same. Life changes when we're looking at it and when we're not looking at it. So stay focused and directed with your attention on those things that are positive and beneficial but don't disregard the changes around you that require adjustments.
And, by the way, later on our evening walk I noticed that all of the newly concreted street corners were safely wrapped with, not only orange cones, but also sticks and warning tape. Oblivious, in-the-zone people everywhere, were grateful.

Peace to you,
Shanti

Don’t Look at Obstacles Blocking Your Path

9/7/2018

I’ve been doing a lot of biking this summer - over 450 miles so far - and have luckily had only one incident of road rash. A graceful glide to the earth, played out in slow motion, I was going along a gravel-filled back road when my tire hit the edge of rock and twisted my bike down one way while I fell the other way. Half my body covered in dirt, lower leg scraped of skin, a still-tender injury to my knee but, overall, it could’ve been a lot worse.
   I notice when I ride now that I’m much more aware of the rocks on the ground. With all the recent rain pushing things into the streets, rocks seem to be scattered everywhere. It’s a funny thing that happens to me when I see one in front of me, though. Instead of my front tire avoiding it, there’s an unconscious swerve towards the rock. At the last minute I have to wake my brain and body up to steer away and avoid another crash.
   Interestingly, if I keep my focus on the empty space that surrounds the rock on the road, my bike automatically maneuvers there. It doesn’t take any extra energy or directed thought - it just happens - and gives me a very successful ride.
   This is similar to what can happen as you’re going about your day. You’re focused on going from A to Z, solving problems and taking corrective action. At the same time, though, there’s a part of your brain that’s guarding against issues that you know might impede your progress. The rationale is that, by keeping an eye on the known problems, you’ll end up avoiding them. The brain is wired to search out potential harm so this safety feature comes on-line without much thought.
The reality, though, is that whatever you’re focusing on is where you’re going to go.Even if it’s not really where you want to go, if you’re looking there, you're headed towards it… not the best scenario and can lead to lots of complications and duplicity in both life and work product.
It takes practice to keep your focus on what you do want and let go of what you don’t want. Building this strength in attention, similar to what happens in meditation, requires that you keep steering yourself back to what you want, where you want to be, and what's working well.
Instead of looking at the objects blocking your path to success (whatever your success looks like, even if it’s just laundry), shift your focus to the open space where potential and possibilities lie, where it’s going well, and where you’re able to take good action (aka the space in between the rocks). Let the obstacles go to the side of the road.
Questions for you then... What are the rocks in your life that you no longer want to come in contact with? How are you steering your life so they don’t keep incrementally popping up and so that what you do want paves the road ahead for you?
If you’re finding it difficult to steer or navigate your course, give me a shout and we’ll come up with some ways that will have your ride a lot easier, smoother, and fun. Enough wasting your energy on things you don’t want. Let’s have your life filled with things that make you sing.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Where’s your determination taking you?

7/19/2018

Determination, as defined by meditation teacher Sylvia Boorstein, is “the decisive energy of a moment of absolute resolve”. I love the “absolute resolve” portion of this definition since it really speaks to the quality of energy needed to be determined about something. It’s not wishy washy or sorta-kinda or even if-everything-lines-up-I-will energy. It’s steadfast, pronounced, and gonna-happen-no-matter-what energy. This is the energy of creation and real change.
Determination is the perfect word to describe my energy these past few months. I’ve been completing my book Everyday Ease: Mindfully Moving from Burnout to Balance and OMG what a process… not the concept or the content but the nitty gritty editing, formatting, more editing, and fonting. I can’t tell you how many hours I spent selecting and dreaming about fonts. Really.
Every open space I had in my schedule would be used to do more work on the book, having faith that consistently taking one step after another within this huge process would result in something I was proud to share with the world. There were days I thought it would never end, feeling like I was birthing my fourth child. “I just want this thing done!” like in the final trimester. Other days would flow and be so easy and yet others would cause me to shed tears and feel completely exasperated. Yet I always kept the faith… and kept going.
I’m proud as a new birth mother to tell you that, sans one final review after a few days of rest and then off to publish, Everyday Ease is done!!! Hallelujah!!!
In the meantime, I’m happy-happy with a strong sense of pride and appreciation for my level of determination. A lot of other things have been happening in my life these past few months yet I’ve been able to harness my focus and attention from some significantly disruptive events to land on something that feels good and feeds my vital energy.
Turning now to ask you, what sort of things are you offering the energy of determination in your life? What’s pushing you forward in a positive, hopeful, and passionate way? With the last half of summer still fresh and available, are there house or work projects that you’re excited and energized about? The sense of accomplishment you’ll feel in creating something previously barren will give you great confidence so look around and go forth. Use your determined energy and resourcefulness for something that you love.

Peace to you,
Shanti