Blog - 8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

Got Rhythm?

2/19/2020

Just like you, I’ve got a ton of things that need my attention through the day. There are a lot of pieces to keeping a business prosperous and, if I’m not careful, shiny objects can’t tantalize my attention away from what’s really important. I want, and need, to stay focused.

My tendency, though, is to be a pendulum swinger, going from being FULL ON for days and then, invariably, swinging in the other direction and feeling fizzled out. I swing from 100% to near zero… and then have to energize myself to get going again. This wide swinging is terrible.

Something I’ve been doing for the past year, though, has changed all of this. As much as possible, I work with my ultradian rhythms throughout the day.

I’m sure you’ve heard of circadian rhythms. These are the 24 hour cycles we go through each day that help us with sleep-awake cycles. They’re connected to our hormonal system, specific brain activity, cell regeneration, and other biological processes.

Ultradian rhythms are smaller chunks - typically 90 minutes on then 20 minutes off. During the 90 minutes, we can give it our all and be really energized and focused. After that, though, we need to take a rest of at least 20 minutes, doing something that relaxes our body and brain or changes the energy of what we were doing before. AKA, this means not scrolling on-line, staying seated, or trying to hammer out “one more thing” even if it’s a small task. Be ALL IN and then be ALL OFF.

Personally, most of the day I break this 90 minutes down even further into 30 minute cycles, giving myself a 2-5 minute break in between. I do a few simple stretches, 10 deep breaths, bio break, or check in with my WIN (more on that next week). This helps me stay refreshed and energized, without the end-of-day-dead-tired. And when I do the bigger 20 minutes break, I take a walk, do some jigsaw puzzle, sit in the sun and play ball with Suki, meditate, or take a nap.

And speaking of napping: Yes, yes, yes do it… but not more than 30 minutes. Anything beyond the cat nap situation will begin the 90 minute sleep cycle… which is why it can take hours to “wake up” after a longer nap.

Try working with ultradian rhythms this week and see how your day flows and energy stays more balanced. Again, it’s all about experimenting with optimizing our lives.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

No Doubt the #1 for Energy Management

2/17/2020

Since I was a very young person, I've always made connections between things. How does this impact that and then how does it tie into all of that? Connecting the dots helps me make sense of what happens in life and to see its vast interconnectedness.

For energy, it's the same thing. It's obvious that I won't be at my best when I'm sick (as noted in my last newsletter) but what about those times where I'm hungry, feeling busy, worried, distracted, tired, or lethargic from sitting too much? What are the consequences of those not-so-obvious energy drains?

It can be a really interesting experiment to start monitoring your life since what gets measured gets managed. If you don't know, how can you know?

There are several foundations of energy management that are important to take a look at with my clients, even if it's not their primary reason for working with me. If they're not well resourced in their energy, how can they activate the energy to optimize their hopes and dreams?

Today we’re going to take a peak at #1... sleep. Why sleep? If you're not getting adequate quality sleep, it's nearly impossible to have any positive impact on any area of your life. You tend to eat carbage and sugary foods for energy, over-caffeinate to stay awake, and don't have the organic energy to move freely and with joy in your body. Plus, those nasty gremlins take the bait and run amock with your attitude, focus, and psyche!! After a rough day like that, good luck getting a good night’s sleep... which leads to a continuation of that ill-being cycle.

Sleep is the number one fundamental and the beginning of everything.

How is your sleep? How many hours a night do you get? 7 to 8 hours of restful sleep is the basic prescription; anything under 6 is in the depletion zone. While it might not be as obvious as an all-nighter, that's only because it’s easy to get acclimated to slower / lower functioning and performance, low energy, and sub optimal health.

In his awesome book Why We Sleep, neuroscientist Matthew Walker shares some ugly statistics:

4 hours of sleep for 6 days is the same as being awake for 48 hours.
5 hours of sleep is like having blood alcohol level of .08.
6 hours of sleep is like being awake for 24 hours (the red eye without the flight?).
Emotional reactivity goes up 60%.
Learning and memory are reduced by 50% and more mistakes are made (how much of your day do you spend redoing things or correcting simple errors?).
Spacing out, forgetfulness… 400% lapse in concentration.
The Geneva Convention prohibits sleep deprivation. It’s considered torture.

Yikes! I told you they were ugly.

Not to fear. There are many simple things you can do including:

Stop caffeine in the early afternoon (including dark chocolate - OK, that one might not be easy).
Install a digital sunset = shut electronics and screens off at least one hour before bed. The blue light in the screen messes with your natural production of melatonin, a hormone necessary for balanced sleep cycles.
Check your room temp: 65° is best and no more than 70°.
Have a regular bed and wake time, even on the weekends, one that will get you at least 7 hours. This creates sleep cycles that your body will look forward to.
Stretch and move your body throughout the day, not just at the beginning or end. Get up at least every hour for 2-3 minutes and shake it up!
Nap… but no more than 30 minutes (I’ll share more on these last two in an upcoming Wonder & Wisdom).
Track your sleep. Start a journal and notate how you slept the night before and the effect it has on your day today: what you ate, how you moved, your attitude, focus, and energy level. You might be surprised at some connections that would have been invisible before.

A good night sleep... #1 energy management, plain and simple.

Would it be helpful to figure out your particular secret sauce to better sleep? Let's chat!I'd love to help dissect what's working and not working for you. I want you to have your optimal energy available. How else to have your optimal life?

Sending you lots of Zzzzzzs.

Shanti

Oh.... so many lessons

2/4/2020

After finishing my 10 month Optimize Coaching program in December, I was on fire. My confidence was huge, I was feeling courageous, I was putting myself out there in ways I haven't done in a while (which felt really good), and my creative juices were flowing.

Getting through the weird mid-week holidays and into January, this awesomeness continued. And then I faced something I didn't want to do but previously committed myself to. Even though I was getting a huge nag to change the committed plan, I stuck with it… but it cost me a lot of energy and willpower and totally took me out of flow. And then I got sick, really sick. Laid up in bed for with the flu for five days, recovery still slowly lingering.

During the time that I was sick, there was no energy available to entertain my mind. It was all I could do to maintain awareness of my body, supporting its healing. So I have to smile that the mend begins when the mind comes in… although that is really quite the opposite of what happened.

Instead of my mind being my champion, it was the most disruptive unhealthy part of me. It was like the gremlins got together while I was “unconscious” for so many days and decided to attack when things started to get better. Every nook and cranny of how bad and wrong and insignificant and unworthy of greatness I might be was busting out at the seams. The flu was nasty enough but this mindset? How can I be doing this to myself? I'm in the practice of self-love, self-care, and self compassion. Where was it for me?

Of course I didn't have the energy to fight with my mind. It was hard enough trying to walk up and down the stairs. So here I was, face-to-face with the Gremlins of Dark. What to do?

Since I was already laying down, it was natural just to have my gremlins lay down next to me. What are you really trying to say to me? What's your real message? Hopefully somewhere in there you're trying to inspire me… what insights can I draw from your criticisms? What are you hoping that I'll do differently in my life? And who invited you into this room, anyways? Do I want you here? Do I need you here?

It's easy to get lost in the fear mind, in the old tapes we play, the ones that have been playing for decades about how we're not as good as we think we are and we'll never make it the way we really want to make it. Even after decades of work, we might ask ourselves "is any of that true?"

Laying there with my fear, it was true… from my fear’s perspective. But it wasn't true from my heart’s perspective.

My heart is deeply and directly connected to my basic goodness and the all the ways I want to make this world a better and more loving place. I have so much to offer and, while I’m not always showing up as fully as I’d like, I'm working on it. Every day I head a little bit more in that direction. I help people through my coaching practice, supporting others to connect with their possibilities and worthiness. I share a lot of skills with business organizations throughout the world, helping team members have a little bit more ease and balance in their jam-packed days. And I provide a safe place for people to share themselves, to be seen and heard.

All I can give to my life is a chance, to optimize as best I can every moment that I'm given. Am I 100% “on” all the time? Absolutely not. But identifying more “on” than “off” and celebrating that keeps the spiral moving upward. Sure, the gremlins are going to be right there but maybe they'll be a little bit quieter if they can lay down next me instead of screaming in my face.

Reminders and learnings? Plenty:
1) Honor the inner message of NO.
2) A low-resourced body = a low-resourced mind (more on this next time).
3) Just because you think it certainly doesn't make it true.
4) Emotions are to be understood, not feared.

Peace and Love to you,
Shanti

P.S. You might be wondering why I share these stories of myself so often. Isn't that a backwards thing for a coach to do? Where's the rah-rah and inspiration? Well, first of all, coaching isn't about being a blind cheerleader. It's about getting real with the ins and outs, the pushes and pulls, that we're presented with on a regular basis. I see my life experience reflective of and rooted in our shared humanity. If I can't be real with my shenanigans, how can I possibly support you to be real with yours? And somewhere within that I hope it's inspiring. Thanks for being in my world.

What do you really need?

11/26/2019

As I was laying on the floor with my dog Suki the other day, I was looking around at all the stuff in the room. First of all, it's really cool to get a dog’s perspective on life and second, it's pretty interesting what we humans collect.

Seven and a half years ago I had a fire in my house and lost nearly everything. After rebuilding, I came back into the house with very few things, determined to keep the space clean and clear. I had been decluttering as the boys had been getting older but it still amazed me how much stuff I had.

I don't think I have a ton of stuff now but I do notice that it has begun to fill up. There are duplications of many things and other items that I’ve rarely used. How many sets of sheets, hiking boots, jackets, pots and pans, coffee maker pots, or candles do I really need? The initial desire and craving to want something or the awesome feeling that comes with “I scored a great deal!” is great but really, what am I doing with it all? Where’s the value?

“Stuff” can be a lot to take care of, to keep clean, to keep track of. It can really weigh you down after a while and have the space feeling pretty heavy. Is this why we don’t like to clean the house? And while there may be a sense of being full, too much can also lead to a feeling of emptiness.

In our consumerism world, we’ve been taught that “things” can make us happy, give us comfort, have us feeling safe and secure. All you have to do is watch a TV ad to dissect the not-so-subliminal messages. Even our brain helps this along as we get a little hit of dopamine every time we click the Buy Now button.

Underneath it all, though, when we truly look, we know that things don’t matter in the scheme of life. No one on their death bed ever wished they spent more time shopping and collecting things. It’s people, relationships, heart-felt connections, and experiences that fill us up. Research shows this as well: nearly 70% of us would prefer a gift of connected experience over a material item (great food for thought as we navigate the “giving month”.)

As I near the time when I don't want to be working as much, it begs me to be more intelligent about what I do with my money resources now and to have my personal financial investments be less diversified into the Stuff and Don’t-Really-Need portion of my portfolio which truly hasn’t given a high return on investment.

Over the next few months, I'm going to be more aware and particular about this resource, making note of the essentials versus the disposable, how I share it with other practitioners, and whether they’re local (Small Business Saturday 11/30) or far away (big box shops). I’m sure this’ll create some amusement as we're heading into the holiday purchasing season and I'm secretly grateful that I don't go ballistic with presents like I used to. That's a saving grace.

A practice might be to put things in the Checkout cart but not hit the Buy Now button for a few days, until the dopamine hit has passed and I can re-assess. Another practice might be to purchase only essentials and what's on the shopping list... which will mean cutting chips and chocolate out of my grab-and-go habit (that will certainly save a lot in many areas of my life). And perhaps not buy a book for at least three months. This would certainly test me for sure! I am a book-aholic, after all. Maybe just use what I have to the fullest and go from there.

So, lots of things to mull over… what to do with the extras and any clutter, how to prevent “the fill” from growing, how to enjoy life without the necessity of so many things, and finding spaciousness in simplicity. Yay! What a treat it is to experiment and play with habits of being.
Peace,
Shanti

Rising to Meet Right Now

11/7/2019

Our life is lived in the mundane. Over half of what we do every single day is out of habit, from brushing our teeth to putting on our shoes on to driving to work. Additionally, research has shown that 47% of the time we're not tuned in or present to what we're doing. Our mind is somewhere else… and usually not on a happy thing.

I find so often that we have this need and desire, this striving, for a sense of happiness and joy. With the complexity in speed of the world these days, it seems to be harder and harder to navigate the pathway to peace, ease, and contentment. We search outside of ourselves in multi-directions for that connection to the Source that’s going to have our light shine bright inside.

While we're busy looking for that joy and happiness outside, though, there are so many precious moments that are available to us in the simple things that we do every single day. We can miss many of the gifts that exist in the mundane.

We complain about our coworkers. We can't stand the slow driver in front of us. We may grunt inside when our kids or parents ask us to do one more thing. And that dinner we have to make? It can feel like a hassle to feed our family sometimes.

How beautiful all of these things are, though. Our coworkers help us manage the bigger workload, allowing us to keep our mission-focused energy. That slow driver in front of us… really helpful when there's a cop around the corner ready to give out a speeding ticket. Kids and parents… this is what we live for. They're so precious in our lives and we’d miss them dearly if they weren’t here. And super hooray yay that there's food in the house and that we can come together to eat and share a meal!

Much of how our day takes shape is determined by how we perceive it. Our view dictates how we see the world and engage with it. Sure, there's a lot in life that just needs to be done. We can say no to things, though, and that's fine (it might even be beneficial) but for those things that we say yes to, let’s say a resounding YES. Let’s say YES in our attitude, demeanor, tone of voice and language, actions and behavior. This is how true nobility and heroism happens with the details of our lives.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Perhaps...

11/6/2019

There’s a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck”, they said sympathetically. “Perhaps”, the farmer replied.

The next morning, the horse returned, bringing with it a dozen other wild horses. “How wonderful”, exclaimed the neighbors. “Perhaps”, the farmer replied.

The following day, the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the untamed horses. He was thrown off and broke his leg. The neighbors came, offering sympathy on this misfortune. “Such bad luck." “Perhaps”, the farmer replied.

The next day, military officials came to the village to draft all young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things have turned out. “How wonderful”, exclaimed the neighbors. “Perhaps”, the farmer replied.

What happenings are taking place in your life that, upon first inspection, might be such bad luck or, conversely, be wonderful? Are you attached to the outcomes of either one? How’s that playing out?

The moral of the story: we never know what goodness will come from a terrible situation and we never know how quickly a desired state will change. Perhaps staying steady with the flow of life, as it’s showing up moment to moment, can offer immense value. Instead of swinging between like and dislike (which can just get us all discombobulated), we can rest somewhere in the middle with a gentle smile and openness to what is. Like a tree, roots are grounded and deep while at the same time being flexible enough to shift and sway with the ever-changing winds of life.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Life... Happening Right Now

11/6/2019

This past weekend I attended a Celebration of Life of a friend who passed way too soon. A young mother - 42 - leaving a beloved husband and 6 year old son. Cancer got her… but not the best of her.

This courageous woman lived… lived each day with ferocity, devotion, vitality, hopefulness, inspiration, and joyfulness for everything that was in her life, even the years of complicated and intensive treatments. She turned each one into a gift, a learning moment, a reflection of the value and intensity of life. To the very end, there was joy, singing, laughter, and love.

Unfortunately this was actually the second such unfathomable death this year. In early winter, another dear friend - a young mother of a 5 year old son - died after a long battle with cancer. Annie was a constant beam of Light and Love with the biggest smile you could ever imagine and an infectious energy of joy and peace.

As a mother of 3 boys, my heart rips wide open to these young sons. It boggles my mind what they’ve already been through… even before beginning first grade. What will their life be like without their mother? How will this carry them forward? Blessed for the time they had… gifts of presence and such deep immeasurable Momma love. They are their continuation.

Death is a strange thing. I don’t quite understand it. There’s such a hole in space and time that remains after the beloved passes, a gap waiting to be filled, a curious question mark as you wait their arrival yet again. And in the meantime, life all around continues and moves on, as if not much has changed. It is very strange indeed.

All of this causes me to pause and look deeper, thinking of my own inevitable passing. What’s it going to be like for me? How will I be remembered? What have I done to leave a good mark? How have I touched others' lives, enough for them to carry me along with them for the rest of their lives?

I’m not sharing any of this to be bleak or to extend the loss. I think it’s really important, though, to investigate the meaning and value of our lives as they're happening, to not wait until a dear one passes or tragedy strikes in another way. Each day is a gift, another opportunity to create with purpose and intention. Life gets busy and it can be easy to forget this as we’re task mastering... but what’s the purpose behind it all? Why, exactly, are we rushing from one thing to another?

Death is an important part of life and one that we’ll all experience. How can we use that for fuel to live each day with vitality and presence, to touch in our hearts what’s really important, and to show up valuing each and every moment?

One of the daily practices I have is morning reflection - how do I want to show up today, what qualities of character do I want to nourish, how can I stay clear and balanced to meet my moments with heart-filled presence? This helps me set the stage for the day. I inevitably forget along the way, though, especially as some days take on a life of their own. It’s all a practice.

And at the end of each day, a reflection on how I showed up, how I can up-spiral tomorrow, bringing kindness and self-compassion to my heart knowing I did my best, even if the circumstances were cruddy and I wasn’t my optimal self.

The invitation then is to take in the importance of who and how you are, to know that you make a significant difference in this world, that you matter deeply, and that you have immense love and wonder to bring to those around you - both the know and unknown.

It’s the texture and quality of our lives that matter, not just in the end, but in each step in the middle. Many blessings to you.

Peace and Love to you,
Shanti

Good Aim

9/23/2019

In early early 1990s, the cleaning staff of Schiphol Airport in Amsterdam installed a small sticker that looked like a fly near the center of each urinal. Apparently, when men stepped up to the urinals, the aimed for what they thought was a bug. The stickers improved their aim and significantly reduced “spillage” around the urinals. Further analysis determined that the stickers cut bathroom cleaning costs by 8% per year.*

The lesson?

Besides all of us mothers buying fake fly stickers, one way to easily improve your success rate of installing a new habit is by setting up a supportive environment. Create obvious cues that keep you on track and make it easy to do the right thing.

~ Want to reduce junk food consumption? Along with not purchasing the junk food, have clean fruits and veggies prepared and readily available on the counter and coffee table.
~ Want to drink more water? Fill up a few water bottles each morning and put them in places where you spend lots of time.
~ Want to remember to read before bed instead of TV? Put your book on your pillow in the morning.
~ Want to move your body through the day? Set a repeat-timer on your phone.

What healthy habit would you like to install? Share with me here and join the upcoming Habits Made Easy workshop to see what you can easily, and in a fun way, switch up in your life. We all have habits. Which ones would you like working for you?

Peace and Love,
Shanti
*from James Clear, Atomic Habits

Keeping the System Going

9/16/2019

Yeah! The kids are back to school and a new routine has begun. It feels refreshing to get organized after the meandering days of summer… at least I love it. It’s like a reset button has been pushed.

What are some of your strategies? How do you develop habits that are going to last more than a few weeks, that will carry yourself and your family easily into next year and beyond?

At home, some things you might be looking at:

Having easier mornings - YES please
Keeping up with preparing healthy meals and snacks
Study skills that your kids will do on their own (or at least with less whining)
Exercise and keeping the body moving
Finances - seem to always top of mind
Quality time for relationships

At work, some things you might be looking at:

Reducing time wasters that slow-drip your energy and focus
Feeling more accomplished and less “spent” at the end of the day
Taking breaks so your body and brain can refresh
Dealing with email overload
Slowing down to listen to people instead of rushing the conversation along to get to the next thing
Having patience be a continual part of your day

If you’re human, after a few weeks of staying on point, things inevitably seem to slip back to the same old thing. Life gets interrupted and you’ve exhausted the energy of trying to keep the new habit alive… its too much work and willpower is spent. It’s easy to get frustrated when you give up, to go back to the same old thing even if it wasn’t working that well. And then you end up feeling bad because you let yourself down againand didn’t keep the change. What a crappy cycle.

I want to encourage you and let you know, though, that it’s not you. It’s the systems that are in place.

Habits Made Easy is a new favorite workshop I’m offering, one that’s good for you and good for your kids/teens (they’re encouraged to attend. What a great way to have them get active in developing personal management strategies.)

Habits Made Easy keeps things in balance, reduces stress, adds ease, reduces resistance, guilt, and shame, improves esteem and confidence, and builds self-efficacy. Sounds pretty great to me!

Check it out. It's happening twice at the end of the month - plenty of time to plan and get it one on your calendar. Registration is needed and easy HERE.
Peace and Love,
Shanti

And by the way, Habits Made Easy isn’t an app or a set system per se. It’s the name of my workshop... one where you learn the process of how habits are built, how they crash and fail, and how to install new ones that are truly functional for everyday living.

Declutter Starts With The Mind

9/4/2019

A change of season always brings me the energy of clearing out; a time to declutter and make room for something new and different, something that will keep me inspired and motivated for the changes ahead. Whether the focus is home projects, business projects, relationships, or mindset, it requires my time and attention to pick up, look at, and decide what’s important now. My energy and resources are finite so I want to be as efficient as possible while still having impact.

As of late, I've been noticing more of my time and attention feels stuck in the minutia of what could stand to be decluttered instead of what might be best to focus on. Instead of taking the big pile and putting it to the side, I keep sifting through it in hopes of getting rid of it. Haha that’s a joke since I know the project list is never ending. It’s so interesting how the habit mind works.

Some days there can be a fine line between what needs to get done, what's best to get done, what I want to do, and what I just want to be done with. The request list seems really long and my decisive mind can get lost in the possibilities, leading me to feel ineffectual and frustrated, spread thin as I'm being pulled in several directions... or rather, pulling myself in many directions. I'm the one "in control", you see.

Reflecting, I think it's all just part of the cleansing process since most of the things seem to be related. Some days, though, I wish the pull of my mind were less and easier to deal with. It’s a practice… and a habit I continue to refine and develop.

Thankfully, part of that refinement comes from my meditation practice, a daily routine that works to keep me centered and grounded, much more than I could ever possibly do on my own with my natural energy constitution of flittering about. Setting the stage and getting clear in the morning guides my intentions and the path I want to take. It's a time to check in with my heart and authentic desires: How do I want to be today? What's the best use of my energy? Do I need to reset my mind/attitude? What self-care is needed?

Mindfulness and meditation are great ways to declutter, gain clarity, and keep the focus on WIN - what’s important now. It's not always easy to tame the flittering mind that pulls you in many different directions - impulses can be very strong - so it's good to have some stabilizing supports to help navigate today.

How’s your decluttering routine? What do you do to keep the ground underneath your feet as you're moving in so many directions? I'd love to hear what's working well. And if you have any interest in learning more about mindfulness or meditation, reach out or check out the upcoming class.

And next time I’ll share a bit about how to install skillful habits as you go through the seasonal change process, setting yourself up for success right off the bat. In the meantime, happy cleansing!

Peace and Love to you,
Shanti