Swoosh, crunch, swoosh, crunch, swoosh, crunch. You walk down the street these days and that's all you hear. It can be deafening! Some support your step with their suppleness and flexibility. Others are left shattered in a pile of 1,000 crumbled pieces.
     Even though they are part of nature’s whole, each leaf has enjoyed its own life cycle. Some have been able to maintain a more enriched state evidenced by their continued flexibility, even at the late stage of finding a resting spot on the ground. Others have dried up long before they were finally released from the tree.
     As we turn to look at our own leaf-ness, what is our state of flexibility or brittleness? What are those things that keep us soft and supple so that we are able to bend when bending is needed or to land without bruising or breaking? If we work with many people, how have we been able to stay flexible in an environment that may drain us of our moisture? Conversely, how are we when we move about our day in an arid way, sucking the moisture out of ideas, people, and even ourselves? For some, arid-ness can be gauged by the speed of reactivity to requests and information, perpetual absenteeism, or being hyper-focused and self-absorbed with complete disregard of the larger circumstance.
     Unlike the leaf that has already fallen, we have the ability to rehydrate when we find we've run dry. We can stop to drink in the wonderful elements of our simple existence and absorb what is needed right now. Purposeful pauses and breathing breaks support a steadiness when harsh winds blow. Opening to the "don't know" mind can offer possibilities not seen before and ease the need for things to be our way. Simply noticing our assumptions, judgments, and aversive view can free us from their brittle consequences. Hydration of body, mind, and spirit can be as simple as that.
     As you move through your fall day today, take inventory of your leaves; those that are flexible and supple and those that are dry and crumbly. Notice your personal weather report and whether you are swooshing or crunching. Generate presence, beginning from your feet.

Sending you lots of peace,
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

     If you're already challenged by your busy calendar, the holiday season probably won't have it feel any easier. I know for me, even though there's still two more months until year end, I'm already busy fine-tuning things so that it ends successfully. Updating my website, new marketing material, interesting event offerings, as well as my personal calendar are all on my radar.
     Even though I’ve narrowed my work scope over the past eight years, there are always so many new and exciting things to offer that I can become a little scattered at times, like Suki when I throw her two balls at once. Each ball is great and fun but which one to pick up and play with? Whenever I do this to her, I can see the confused and anxious state in her eyes, her decision-making process taking shape in front of me. I wish I could understand how she makes her choice but ultimately, after sniffing and chewing on each, even trying to put both in her mouth at the same time, she somehow decides which one we’ll play with for the next fifteen minutes. I really appreciate her commitment to her decision, too, since she won’t switch balls halfway into our play game, no matter if I start throwing a different ball. She’s dedicated, highly focused, and committed. Once again, I could learn a lot from Suki.
     While I think I’m fairly good at blocking my time to attend to specific activities or subject matters, I often notice a frenetic quality to my attention. Settling into a creative space between scheduled events isn’t always easy, resulting in a sense of disconnect between what I need to be doing and what I’m capable of doing. There’s real training in coming back to knowing what you can and can’t do, letting go of the frustration of what won’t work even though you want it to, and then moving forward with what’s possible.
     So how do we approach all the things we want to accomplish in the time and energy frame we have?
     I find it’s more challenging in this over-stimulated age of electronics and social media to steer clear of the shiny object syndrome. Our attention is constantly being diverted (yes, we do need to train ourselves to stick to task). Combined with less available time due to extended work weeks or family responsibilities, a life that is gravitating towards peace may be the opposite of what we are feeling.
     Take a look at how many things you have on your calendar right now. I’m sure they’re all good and serve a healthy purpose. The question to ask is if they create a sense of balance and joy or has our initial excitement turned to dread or obligation. Book clubs, PTO meetings, photography class,... add in the myriad of work, home, and family stuff... where is the room to breathe, enjoy, and self-nurture?
     None of this is to say not to be involved or to expand your connections. Quite the opposite. Creating depth of attention and truly experiencing our experience so that we don’t surface-skim our showing up is important. Let’s develop our skill of discernment, though, and commit like Suki to that one ball we are playing with so that we can enjoy it fully and not feel the pressure and added weight of everything else that is calling our attention. On a different day when it’s right to play with a different ball, we can do that, but for now let’s hone to come home.
     Need some quick tips on how to do that? Check out these 5 Super Honing Supports

1. Say “No, not now” to say “Yes!”
You aren’t very good when you’re over-extended or exhausted so kindly say “No, Not Now” to the next request that comes your way. Doing this will help you to say “Yes!” to yourself. And not to worry as someone else will pick up the piece you were about to carry.

2. Focus on only one activity per month
Instead of scattering your attention over numerous activities, pick one and delve into that. By engaging in just this, your enjoyment for this activity will grow and you’ll learn more about it that you would have thought possible. Leave the others to have their turn over the coming months.

3. Create daily time just for you
20 minutes minimum is my recommendation; meditation, bath, yoga, walk, napping, knitting… whatever keeps a connection to yourself alive!

4. Plan ahead and prepare meals
Save time, calories, and health. Don’t be caught off-guard with last minute kitchen and nutrition messes. Decide dinner in the morning, double-cook soups and stews for future-freeze, and prepare snacks and salads by cutting 3X the amount of veggies.

5. Purposeful Pauses
Break the flow of constantness with 10+ second breaks throughout the day. Stop, breathe, feel your feet, and notice the physical and mental sensations. By tuning in to the present moment, we can decide more clearly what is needed next.

Love and peace,
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

"There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~ Anais Nin

Do you ever put off making a change until the situation is so bad that you feel like you have no other choice, where you’ve backed yourself into a corner and are now using the intensity of the situation to finally propel you to take action?

I used to do this all the time. I would wait for things to be so terrible and ugly that I couldn’t stand it anymore. Only then would I make a change and shift in a new direction. Rock bottom had to be hit before I would rise like a phoenix and take care of myself. Somewhere in there was a warped strong-hold, my “worker ant” mentality gone awry. It also reflected my lack of self-worth and my secret belief that I didn’t deserve to be happy.

Ya, this didn’t work so well in my marriage or other relationship shifts that needed to happen. It also kept me from exploring more amicable and suitable paths of recovery and hopeful living. Thanks goodness I’ve learned to change this way go being, for myself and everyone else around me. It’s definitely made a big difference in the level of drama and trauma in my life. Now I’m more often compelled to reflect on my situation and to change things as I move along. Tweaking the small steps is a lot easier and feels a lot better than waiting for the shit to hit the fan.

How about for you? What changes have you ignored that would be really important for your happiness and that would really add value? What uncomfortableness are you still shoulder-high in… a job that’s not fulfilling, a relationship that needs a re-work, a life passion unfulfilled??

We don’t need something to go wrong in order to change. We don’t have to wait that long, for the forces of drama and trauma to invade our life and drive us to switch things up. We are each too valuable to give up on ourselves and our dreams / desires so easily. Don’t let the comfort of others keep us uncomfortable.

Need some guidance or a reflective mirror? Let me help you take charge and once again feel confident in the importance of you.

Love and peace,
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

     Deep, slow breaths... purposefully trying to relax my body... bringing my mind to a neutral, even happy, place. Tapping my Triple Warmer 3 (TW3) point, breathing for 10, then tapping some more. Ahhh...and finally, for the first time in a long time, no tears running down my face and no death-grip on the leather arm rest. Phew and yeah!
     These are some of the calming tools I brought into my dental session the other week when I had to have both a crown and a filling replaced. Not anyone's idea of fun but, for me with an extensive dental history and a deep visceral reaction (no need to go into unpleasant details), a more disruptive experience.
     What was different time? Arriving with my mindfulness and meditation practice in hand, I also now invoke some Eden Energy Medicine. The TW3 "Fear Point" shown above is an acupressure point that runs along the Triple Warmer meridian. this meridian is, among other things, responsible for our fight/flight/freeze. Tapping here helps to relieve that stress / fear and, along with the breath, can bring a greater sense of calm to an otherwise high-tension moment. Simply tap that point 10 times with your other pointer and middle finger, pause for a few breaths, then tap it another 30 times. If fear is still prominent, try the same sequence on the other hand. For me, it worked like a charm. (Insert big smile.) I'm very grateful for this energy support and also grateful for my dentist and staff. Life would not be so pretty without them. And while I still dislike being in that office (and luckily it's much less), it's now much more comfortable.
     So try TW3 tapping the next time you are in a fearful / anxious mind place and see how your energies change. I'd love to hear your story so please share with comments below!

Love and peace to you!
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

     When on retreat at the monastery, we live as a community. Each of us works in groups doing small jobs that, when summed together, help support the function of the larger whole. In the Plum Village tradition these jobs are called working meditation. Working is a meditation because, when we attend to it, we attend to it fully. It is a way to practice mindfulness, bringing honor and respect to the work as a reflection of our care for the larger community.
     During this past retreat, my groups was on dish washing duty - making sure that the dish washing area was set up so that retreatants could wash their dishes after eating. There were four tables set up for this, each one with four buckets of water - one warm and soapy and three for progressive rinsing. Since it was spread over a large area of the grounds, the hose from the main building was not able to reach the fourth table.
     On one particular day there was a gap in the schedule between the end of the Dharma talk and walking meditation. While waiting for walking meditation to begin, I noticed that a fellow working meditator was beginning to fill the washing buckets at Table 1. I gladly went over to help and, knowing that the hose didn't reach Table 4, brought those empty buckets over to be filled. With so much sitting and being out of my daily exercise routine, I was looking forward to moving some muscles by carrying the full buckets of water back to Table 4. And I wasn't concerned that the water would get cool while we did walking meditation before lunch since the dish washing area was in full sun and it had been a consistent sunny, 90+ hot and humid for days.
     I was so happy waiting for the buckets to be filled, standing and watching my breath and feeling the not-yet-blistering sun. While standing, a Sister came over and began rearranging the extra empty buckets I had brought over from Table 4. When I told her what I was doing, she looked at me and told me that it was OK and to put them back. I reassured her it was no problem for me to bring the full buckets over to Table 4 and that I was just helping out before walking meditation. She again requested, with the sweet insistence that only a monastic can, to bring the empty buckets to Table 4 and that "we will move full buckets from Table 3 and, in that way, will conserve our energy".

                                            I felt like I was hit with a sharp dart... pang... deflated.

     Even though her words were encouraging and I knew she was just being thoughtful in looking out for my welfare, my inner child was deeply touched. I felt taken aback, not quite reprimanded, but hurt in a very soft and tender place.
     After returning the empty buckets to Table 4 and with the Sister's encouragement, I quietly walked over to where walking meditation was starting. Tears began to well in my eyes and my throat was so closed that I couldn't join in singing the walking gatha songs. I knew there was so much more to this simple interaction and held on desperately within myself to find what that was. I didn't want to start balling but did let the tears come. I had no fear about doing this, knowing that the monastery is a safe place to be as you are and to be held by the larger community. Searching for the next best step, I invited my inner child to hold my hand as I walked with the group of 200 others, allowed gentle tears to caress my face as I took one step... one step... one step.
     Breathing into my body and feeling it relax a bit, I let myself settle and see what was there. The sister was right and hers was a genuine concern, especially as the weather had been so hot the past few days. I quietly thanked her. More breath. "I wanted to help, though." said my inner child's voice. "Was I not needed? Did I not belong?" More breath as I held my pain with gentle awareness and glad for the gift of being able to touch these tender seeds. I held myself like a mother holds a hurt child, not seeking answers but just being there to comfort the pain and for the child to be seen. It was a very old pain.
     I continued to walk to rest of that meditation with my inner child in one hand and Thay, my Oma, and all my other guides and supports in the other. It was very nurturing and, in the end, brought me to ask myself, like the buckets of water, what things in my life am I carrying that I don't need to? Might there be an easier and less strenuous way to arrive at the same, if not better, results? Conversely, what am I not putting effort into that could use the attention and how can I best divert resources to something that is more meaningful? Basically, where am I mismanaging my energies and how does that play out in my life?
     As I've come back home off retreat, I'm taking a look around at where and how I am spending my time. As someone in the support services, it's easy to get lost doing things that you think will be of benefit or over- extending your services beyond the Oxygen Mask (i.e. taking care of yourself). Balance in all segments of life is the Middle Way and one that creates freedom alongside diligent effort. It's certainly a practice for me and, in the meantime, I continue to have gratitude to the Sister for bringing it to my attention once again.
     So what about you? Where do you find that you are wasting efforts, energy, or time? How does that impact your life and how you care for yourself? If you could change or improve one thing as this season of change is upon us, what would that be? Share with me if you'd like. I'd love to hear your inspiration for transition.

Love and peace to you!
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

     Has anyone figured out what this life is for, why we are here, what this whole thing is about? I know, silly question to ask since it’s the ultimate one we all have about our existence but it’s one that I’ve really been pondering quite a bit recently. I’m trying to connect with the great Master Plan that I envision must be out there, held by the Universe far, far beyond what my little humanity has been able to reach so far. Yes, I know we are here to do good, to promote and spread love, and to continue the path of enlightenment for all beings. I have a nag inside, though, about this Master Plan, envisioning that it lays out the purpose behind everything we try to make sense of. Sometimes I feel like a marionette in a puppet show, acting out the story but never having the script of where it’s supposed to lead. It’s like a constant improv. I really think the performance I could give would be a lot more meaningful, vibrant, and fulfilling for all parties involved if I knew, though. Yes, this is my mind sometimes, showing me that I might be a little too goal oriented and just need to loosen up! (I hope you are amused and not frightened for me.)
     As a summertime treat I’ve been watching BBC’s Planet Earth series and am continually blown away by the immense diversity, spectacular-ness, and innate intelligence of the life that is contained on this breathtaking planet, including the amazing assortment of ecosystems. In my wildest imagination I couldn’t come up with all the uniquenesses of the thousands of species; the colors, shapes, reliances for survival, patience, habits of traveling thousands of miles for food or procreation just to do it all again next year. For me, I still can’t wrap my head around the workings of our brain or body. It’s way beyond science fiction and makes me even more desirous to have insight into the Master Plan.
     After a time, I finally ask myself “Does it really matter?”. In reality, probably not and I’m sure it’s best for me to spend my time creating peace, emitting love, and spreading light and positivity into each moment instead. To do what I can do and to trust the process , to “let go and just be”. I’m sure the Master Plan folks would appreciate that. And in writing those words, I do need to laugh at how many times in my life I’ve been told to simply “trust the process”. Haha. Another contemplation is provided.
     Well, if you have any answers or insights, I’d love to hear them. Feel free to add some comments below.

Peace and LOTS of joy in Being.
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

     This past weekend I spent Saturday a most wonderful Day of Mindfulness at Rose Apple in VT and, as it always seems to be, the Dharma talk was perfect and felt like it was directed right at me. Brother Zohar shared insights about time... actual time and storyline time.
     Actual time is a fact. It's contained fully in the present moment. It doesn't direct us in any way and, with its simplified self, moves along at a consistent and measurable pace. Storyline time, on the other hand, is directly connected to the story of us and the forward motion that most of us have in our approach to life. It's the back story of why we rush through things, task master the objects in front of us, and seek to gain control of our experience. We're moving forward out of this ever-present moment into anticipation of the next moment, spending little time here and now.
     Storyline time prevails when we are searching for joy and happiness outside of this moment. We think that it is somewhere else. There may be an uncomfortableness here and now, an aspect of grief or sadness, an emotion of dissatisfaction that is searching for harmony. Instead of residing in the Now to reconcile that, we unconsciously search for this freedom in the next moment, feeding a habit of striving that leaves us even more unfulfilled.
     Take a look at how you receive each moment of the day. From observation of my own experience, I feel like I'm under an invisible time pressure much of the day. Even though I'm great at calendaring and leaving space, there's still an essence of this push to get things done and onto the next. As a business owner, there are many details that I need to attend to and that involve planning future events in order to maintain a consistent level of business activity.
     The continual calendaring of my day, however, brings about a momentum of moving from one activity to the other that can be challenging to stop. The dribble of  "after I get these things done..." is a common quote I can replay over and over in my mind when it's time to settle down and really take a break, to stop the locomotion of doing and let go into pure being, a being that goes well beyond the body stopping. The result is a relationship to time that can be scattered, shattered, and multidirectional with an element of dissatisfaction to what is right now. And underneath this striving can be a level of fear, unworthiness, agitation, and a general sense of joylessness.
     This isn't to say that planning and taking care of things isn't important but it begs me to notice how much time and mental effort is spent in the subtle search for happiness. Even with an active mindfulness practice, staying here and not escaping into Doing can be challenging. Fortunately my teacher Thich Nhat Hanh so eloquently reminds me with this quote above which is so true. Stopping to be right here, it is possible to live happily in each moment and still get things done. It all rests on the attention and intention I am placing in the moment, reverting from getting caught up in my own story and the master manipulation of my experience.
     Time is as it is. All the rest is just a mental construct. Time is something that we can't get back, no matter how much we try. As I continue to age, this becomes more prevalent in my consciousness. Perhaps this has added to my sense of rushing. I seek to have so much peace, love, and harmony in my life and, instead of seeing that it's right here right now, I am being pulled by my habit energies to seek it out. Look, look, though! In the mirror resides all that I need and, when this is my footing, I can walk safely into whatever arrives next.
     Yup, and that's why we call it  "practice". Simple but certainly not easy!

Peace,
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

Rough day? Rough week? Want an easy way to shake it off and get back on track? Try Expelling the Venom on for size. Instead of spewing your "stuff" on other people, step away into a private space and enjoy this fun and exhilarating energy exercise. Do it a few times if you need to, be loud if you need to - it doesn't matter. Just do it! You'll be feeling fantastic and back to your old self in no time.

P. S. And invite your colleagues, partner, and kids to join you as well. You're not the only one with stress and, if you've had a tough day, they probably have as well.

Peace,
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC