A number of years ago my middle son Everett and I were on our annual camping vacation, this time up at Acadia National Park in Maine. It was a long drive and we stopped on a wooded coastal path to take a walk.
     As we walked on the paved roadside path, up ahead I saw a deer sprawled out in front of us across the path. Its head and body were completely limp against the ground and I assumed it was dead, perhaps have been struck by a passing car from the road above. We instantly stopped in our tracks and my hands went to my heart, feeling so sad and helpless for this poor deer that had lost its life so innocently. Tears started to well up in my eyes and I didn't want to move forward towards it.
     Eventually we started walking ahead and, as we did, the deer started to change. It started shape-shifting and, as we were nearly upon it, I noticed that it wasn't dead at all! It was in fact a big living tree root that had busted out of the paved pathway. Everett and I stood there deeply laughing at ourselves… but also seriously relieved.
     I tell this story because so often we look at something and we see it as something completely different than it actually is. We create stories based upon our immediate perception, not taking the time to investigate and see if our view is real. These misperceptions can drive significant emotions and actions, putting us into a state of stress, frustration, overwhelm, fear, sadness,… the whole gamut. Without checking in, slowing down, asking questions (“Is this true?”) or having “don't know” mind, we can get entangled pretty quickly.
     Mindfulness helps us sharpen our perceptual field to notice more accurately what is actually there and notice what we might not know. It offers us more authentic relationship to our experiences and supports a more cohesive engagement with life. Basically, mindfulness can shift to you from reactivity to reality.
     So if you want to “get more real”, check out the upcoming Intro to Mindfulness & Meditation class that starts Thursday April 12. Block your calendar, register, and make a plan. In the meantime, I'm always happy to have a 1-1 conversation to see how this practice can fit into your life and help you create the best life ever.
 
Peace and Love,
Shanti

     I’m sure, like me, your heart was breaking last week when you learned of the Parkland, Florida shooting. So much suffering, loss, and pain in a matter of minutes. People’s entire dreams, hopes, and aspirations… vanished. The lives of everyone involved will never be the same again and my heart wept for the families who lost loved ones and for the survivors of this traumatic event. It’s hard to imagine the magnitude of their suffering. Compassion and wishes of eventual peace were all I could seem to offer.

     I also had feelings of compassion for the shooter, so saddened that his life had so much turmoil and pain that this was the action he chose. What could possibly be behind that?! From what I’ve read, his life was filled with immense loss and tragedy.
     I realize that might seem radical, to have compassion for the perpetrator of so much devastation. It's not to excuse or justify his deadly and horrific actions or to move from the pain of the victims - not at all! -  but it had me connecting to the deeper wounds of our humanity that are behind this event. There’s so much pain and suffering in this world and at times it feels like it'll never end.

                                                            What can we do about?

     At the root, we need to reverse the level of hate and fear and replace it with love; loving ourselves, loving one another, taking care to care, not shunning the weak and lonely but seeing that they are a representation of our bigger society. Sure, this sounds pollyanna and I don't really care that it does. I feel very strongly about it and know it to be true. Nothing survives in an environment of hate, fear, loneliness, or isolation. Love, kindness, compassion, empathy, understanding, and all the prosocial emotions are what makes our lives and societies work well.
 
                                                           How do we access that?
 
     The first thing is to get clear and bring this into our heart… to feel love inside, to cultivate peace in ourselves, to be at ease in our own personal lives… all so that we might be better able to participate in and facilitate change.
      A meditation practice that cultivates this energetic peacefulness and compassion is loving-kindness. With loving-kindness meditation, we offer wishes of happiness, non-suffering, peace, and ease to groups of people: from those that we love dearly to those that we feel have caused us great suffering. We open our hearts and allow compassionate energy to flow, extending this gift that can only come from a feeling sense.
     To activate this energy in this meditation, you repeat specific phrases several time, slowly and with intention, allowing yourself to sink into what they express. As your heart opens with the feeling sense of compassion and care, you can then send it out to others.
      While you can change the phrases of this meditation, common ones that repeated are:

                             May I / you know happiness and the roots of happiness.
                         May I / you be free from suffering and the roots of suffering.
                                          May I / you be safe and free from harm.
                                          May I / you live in peace and be at ease.
 
     Spend some time and try this on yourself. Get quiet and calm, send the above wishes to yourself then slowly extend these wishes to others. It’ll add a lot of heart to your presence in the world... which will impact many. And if you’d like to listen to a guided loving-kindness meditation, click HERE .
     Thank you, thank you, for your Heart! I deeply appreciate your presence.
 
Peace and Love,
Shanti

     Deep, slow breaths... purposefully trying to relax my body... bringing my mind to a neutral, even happy, place. Tapping my Triple Warmer 3 (TW3) point, breathing for 10, then tapping some more. Ahhh...and finally, for the first time in a long time, no tears running down my face and no death-grip on the leather arm rest. Phew and yeah!
     These are some of the calming tools I brought into my dental session the other week when I had to have both a crown and a filling replaced. Not anyone's idea of fun but, for me with an extensive dental history and a deep visceral reaction (no need to go into unpleasant details), a more disruptive experience.
     What was different time? Arriving with my mindfulness and meditation practice in hand, I also now invoke some Eden Energy Medicine. The TW3 "Fear Point" shown above is an acupressure point that runs along the Triple Warmer meridian. this meridian is, among other things, responsible for our fight/flight/freeze. Tapping here helps to relieve that stress / fear and, along with the breath, can bring a greater sense of calm to an otherwise high-tension moment. Simply tap that point 10 times with your other pointer and middle finger, pause for a few breaths, then tap it another 30 times. If fear is still prominent, try the same sequence on the other hand. For me, it worked like a charm. (Insert big smile.) I'm very grateful for this energy support and also grateful for my dentist and staff. Life would not be so pretty without them. And while I still dislike being in that office (and luckily it's much less), it's now much more comfortable.
     So try TW3 tapping the next time you are in a fearful / anxious mind place and see how your energies change. I'd love to hear your story so please share with comments below!

Love and peace to you!
Shanti

Shanti Douglas
Mindfulness & Stress Management Coach
Eden Energy Medicine Certified Practitioner
8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC