Blog - 8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

Good Aim

9/23/2019

In early early 1990s, the cleaning staff of Schiphol Airport in Amsterdam installed a small sticker that looked like a fly near the center of each urinal. Apparently, when men stepped up to the urinals, the aimed for what they thought was a bug. The stickers improved their aim and significantly reduced “spillage” around the urinals. Further analysis determined that the stickers cut bathroom cleaning costs by 8% per year.*

The lesson?

Besides all of us mothers buying fake fly stickers, one way to easily improve your success rate of installing a new habit is by setting up a supportive environment. Create obvious cues that keep you on track and make it easy to do the right thing.

~ Want to reduce junk food consumption? Along with not purchasing the junk food, have clean fruits and veggies prepared and readily available on the counter and coffee table.
~ Want to drink more water? Fill up a few water bottles each morning and put them in places where you spend lots of time.
~ Want to remember to read before bed instead of TV? Put your book on your pillow in the morning.
~ Want to move your body through the day? Set a repeat-timer on your phone.

What healthy habit would you like to install? Share with me here and join the upcoming Habits Made Easy workshop to see what you can easily, and in a fun way, switch up in your life. We all have habits. Which ones would you like working for you?

Peace and Love,
Shanti
*from James Clear, Atomic Habits

Keeping the System Going

9/16/2019

Yeah! The kids are back to school and a new routine has begun. It feels refreshing to get organized after the meandering days of summer… at least I love it. It’s like a reset button has been pushed.

What are some of your strategies? How do you develop habits that are going to last more than a few weeks, that will carry yourself and your family easily into next year and beyond?

At home, some things you might be looking at:

Having easier mornings - YES please
Keeping up with preparing healthy meals and snacks
Study skills that your kids will do on their own (or at least with less whining)
Exercise and keeping the body moving
Finances - seem to always top of mind
Quality time for relationships

At work, some things you might be looking at:

Reducing time wasters that slow-drip your energy and focus
Feeling more accomplished and less “spent” at the end of the day
Taking breaks so your body and brain can refresh
Dealing with email overload
Slowing down to listen to people instead of rushing the conversation along to get to the next thing
Having patience be a continual part of your day

If you’re human, after a few weeks of staying on point, things inevitably seem to slip back to the same old thing. Life gets interrupted and you’ve exhausted the energy of trying to keep the new habit alive… its too much work and willpower is spent. It’s easy to get frustrated when you give up, to go back to the same old thing even if it wasn’t working that well. And then you end up feeling bad because you let yourself down againand didn’t keep the change. What a crappy cycle.

I want to encourage you and let you know, though, that it’s not you. It’s the systems that are in place.

Habits Made Easy is a new favorite workshop I’m offering, one that’s good for you and good for your kids/teens (they’re encouraged to attend. What a great way to have them get active in developing personal management strategies.)

Habits Made Easy keeps things in balance, reduces stress, adds ease, reduces resistance, guilt, and shame, improves esteem and confidence, and builds self-efficacy. Sounds pretty great to me!

Check it out. It's happening twice at the end of the month - plenty of time to plan and get it one on your calendar. Registration is needed and easy HERE.
Peace and Love,
Shanti

And by the way, Habits Made Easy isn’t an app or a set system per se. It’s the name of my workshop... one where you learn the process of how habits are built, how they crash and fail, and how to install new ones that are truly functional for everyday living.

Declutter Starts With The Mind

9/4/2019

A change of season always brings me the energy of clearing out; a time to declutter and make room for something new and different, something that will keep me inspired and motivated for the changes ahead. Whether the focus is home projects, business projects, relationships, or mindset, it requires my time and attention to pick up, look at, and decide what’s important now. My energy and resources are finite so I want to be as efficient as possible while still having impact.

As of late, I've been noticing more of my time and attention feels stuck in the minutia of what could stand to be decluttered instead of what might be best to focus on. Instead of taking the big pile and putting it to the side, I keep sifting through it in hopes of getting rid of it. Haha that’s a joke since I know the project list is never ending. It’s so interesting how the habit mind works.

Some days there can be a fine line between what needs to get done, what's best to get done, what I want to do, and what I just want to be done with. The request list seems really long and my decisive mind can get lost in the possibilities, leading me to feel ineffectual and frustrated, spread thin as I'm being pulled in several directions... or rather, pulling myself in many directions. I'm the one "in control", you see.

Reflecting, I think it's all just part of the cleansing process since most of the things seem to be related. Some days, though, I wish the pull of my mind were less and easier to deal with. It’s a practice… and a habit I continue to refine and develop.

Thankfully, part of that refinement comes from my meditation practice, a daily routine that works to keep me centered and grounded, much more than I could ever possibly do on my own with my natural energy constitution of flittering about. Setting the stage and getting clear in the morning guides my intentions and the path I want to take. It's a time to check in with my heart and authentic desires: How do I want to be today? What's the best use of my energy? Do I need to reset my mind/attitude? What self-care is needed?

Mindfulness and meditation are great ways to declutter, gain clarity, and keep the focus on WIN - what’s important now. It's not always easy to tame the flittering mind that pulls you in many different directions - impulses can be very strong - so it's good to have some stabilizing supports to help navigate today.

How’s your decluttering routine? What do you do to keep the ground underneath your feet as you're moving in so many directions? I'd love to hear what's working well. And if you have any interest in learning more about mindfulness or meditation, reach out or check out the upcoming class.

And next time I’ll share a bit about how to install skillful habits as you go through the seasonal change process, setting yourself up for success right off the bat. In the meantime, happy cleansing!

Peace and Love to you,
Shanti

Can You Feel It.... whaaaaa

8/28/2019

Can you feel it? The change. It's begun (although this week seems to have flopped back).

I'm already feeling a desire to cozy up on the couch with a good book, let myself linger in bed in the morning, and cook a big pot of veggie stew. Two of the maple trees at the park are turning (pics above) and jeans aren't too far away.

I love this time of year but I'm also pausing in a big way because WHERE’D THE SUMMER GO?!? I feel like I'm just getting started. Two of my boys were reflecting on this as well… now that they're “adulting” (ages 19 and 24), they wonder where the carefree time of summer went.

While this is summer hasn't been filled with big exciting trips or outrageously memorable events (you could say it was the summer of dabbling), it has nevertheless been fulfilling… at least balanced… which is the approach that's becoming more and more important in my life. With my business schedule keeping me busy, if I don't purposefully block time to rest, it all seems to fall apart and I'm not my best self. I'm sure you can relate to overextending yourself then crashing. Before you know it, you're burnt out and good to no one. See my book Everyday Ease: Mindfully Moving From Burnout To Balance for my experience with burnout and why I won't go back there again.

Some of the daily things I do that keep my pendulum from swinging too far in either direction:

Morning meditation and quiet time on the porch
My commitment to my bike riding goal (718 miles down, 282 to go) = 11.5 miles on an average day
Getting up every 32 minutes for a body or breath break
Napping 16 to 22 minutes a few times a week (becoming one of my favorites)
Long lunch/early dinner as a one hour break late in the afternoon
Earth breaks - laying on the grass with Suki and chillaxing
In bed by 9:30, often 9:15
Connecting with a friend to chat and share my humanity

How do you keep your balance going? Share with me what works for you.

Embracing transitions isn’t always easy but it's made much easier by sticking with the foundations that support you. With the change of season, school starting, and life seeming to pick up the pace even more, it's imminently important to purposefully design your day so you can maintain your energy and focus on what you really want.
And on that note, check out the list of upcoming classes and workshops (I think you'll find Habits Made Easy particularly applicable). Fall is going to be pretty exciting. I hope to see many of you soon!

Peace and Love,
Shanti

80 Times a Day... Really?

7/11/2019

If you began to install a mini habit after the Wonder & Wisdom shared two weeks ago, how's that going? I'd love to hear from you! Have you found that the smallness of the change helped it to stick? The research is clear that incorporating mini habits are much more effective in creating lasting change than big evolutionary ones. One baby step at a time with 100% commitment. This is how you get to be fail-proof… because it’s so small it’s completely doable, even when life has it's own plans for your day.

I was speaking with a local organization yesterday about habits and the shiny objectsthat really get in the way of their energy, productivity, and presence. Can you guess what the #1 thing was? You and your loved ones might be experiencing it (including the little ones). I’ll give you some hints. It starts with “i”, is meant to connect you but in reality primarily disconnects you… from your “I” and everyone else.

You guessed it…. iPhone (used here to represent cell phones in general).

Take a peak at your phone habit. How many times a day do you check it or pick it up to see what's new or what you might be missing out on? If you’re the average person (which I know you’re not), it can be 80 times a day = every 12 minutes. Really? Wow!

Maybe you’re not in the 80 per day category but do a little experiment and start keeping track so you know your truth. Even if it isn’t that high, I’m sure you’ve felt the panic and pang of “where is it!?” when you misplaced it. What's going on there?

And what does all that digital checking in do? Messes up your brain, creates unwanted addictions, gets you lost when maybe you really just wanted to be on track, adds to eye and neck strain, damages hearing, and separates you from life as it’s actually happening around you. Yes, I’m sure you’re already aware of this… but where’s your positioning power regarding these harmful effects? Who is mastering who? (or is it "whom is mastering whom?"... I was never good at that.)

One of the huge impacts digital technology has is on sleep. The blue light in electronic devices (phone, iPads, Kindle, TV, laptop) interferes with the natural production of melatonin, a hormone that’s needed for the onset and regulation of sleep. When melatonin levels are off, you have a harder time getting to sleep and really don’t sleep as well. As I’ll share in a future Wonder & Wisdom, sleep is VITAL to a healthy life. (Ugly fact: one method of torture is to not allow people to sleep.)

So let’s combine three things: creating a mini habit for health, reducing our addiction to all things electronic (especially phone), and getting better sleep.

This can come in the form of a digital sunset, i.e. a set bedtime for the electronics, say 7:00pm for starters. Just like you tuck your kids in bed, kiss them goodnight, and let them go to sleep so you can have delicious “me” time, the same thing can happen with your electronics (although pretty weird to be kissing it to sleep).

For the phone, shut it off and put it in a drawer… or in the safe on a shelf in the corner closet behind all the winter coats, offering you plenty of time to reflect “What’s SO important for me to be digging through this stuff to get to that?!?”. For the non-phone items, you get the idea. Put them away, shut them off, and turn to something that’s fun, calming, positive, uplifting, relaxing, and a transition from the regular go-go-go brain waves that creates never-ending, low-grade agitation.

You need a break. They need a break. Have only organic energy drive your transition from the busy day to a peaceful pause and a good night's rest.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Want a Fail-Proof Habit?

7/1/2019

Living a life more self-actualized and one that's more closely aligned with my heart-desired version of Self requires that I let go of that which no longer serves me and add that which offers great benefits and value. I see this up-leveling as a constant evolution - no end in sight - which helps me detach from things needing to be a certain way right now. Life is going to shift and change on me anyways - I can't help that - so staying flexible while remaining focused on +1 improvements keeps me on the right path. And, of course, self acceptance and love come along for the ride.

Change is constant… but not constantly easy. We get really excited in the beginning and spend lots of time, attention, and energy on burning the new shift into our routine… but somewhere along the way the excitement fades and we return to our old set-point. Who can blame us? It takes a lot of energy to keep excitement going and, at some point, we just fizzle out. It's not for lack of effort… but it is mistaken effort.

Instead of powerhousing it in the beginning, how about spreading the energy and diligence of effort over a stretch. Instead of committing to climbing a mountain, how about committing to taking one step on the journey of that mountain, one step every day. Just one.

Sure, it'll take you longer to get to the top but you'll actually get there!! And you'll feel energize and accomplished all along the way. Mountain climbed!

So look around and make note of a change you’d like to make. Then break it down into such a small habit that you can't call possibly fail. Install this new addition and do it, daily, without fail. One step = lifelong habit forming.

Need an example? You commit to running one mile every day. Awesome… but there'll be days when it probably won't happen (weather, schedule, being tired). But you can easily commit to running the length of your 10 foot driveway no matter what else is happening in your life. Every day, 10 feet. Woohoo!

And while you're there, you'll probably run more than the 10 feet (that's like you) so way to go in doing even more! But if you only did 10 feet, that's fantastic! You kept your commitment to self and you met your goal, no matter what. This is how we achieve great things and self actualize our plan.

So what will you install as a mini habit?

Go change! You can do this! And reach out if you need a little bit of guidance or refinement.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Who Are Our Mothers?

5/10/2019

Mother's Day is a day when we celebrate the mothers in our lives. We make time for a visit, shared meal, gifts from the heart, or a call to connect. For some, our mothers are still alive and able to receive these expressions of appreciation. For others, mothers have passed into the realm of beyond. Either way, we give tribute to those that gave birth to us (even if it wasn't a physical birth), those that were an integral part of our foundation and who we are today.

I invite you to go a little further than your biological or relational mother, however, connecting to your long lineage of mothers. Grandmothers, great-grandmothers, great great-grandmothers,… all the way back in time. How do they contribute to who and how are you are today? What gifts of wisdom, diligence, fortitude, fear, and joy did they pass onto you? What’s their continuation in you?

While it may not be obvious in your everyday moments and movements how these women contributed to your Being, they are there, taking each breath along with you. They show up in your smile, in your walk, in the way you don't give up when pushed into a corner. They are part of your intuitive sense of knowing went to take risky action and when to walk away. There are huge part of your never giving-up-attitude since, OMG, the things they went through and the resiliency for life they had to develop to survive!

They are all parts of you – the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful.

This Sunday, celebrate the fullness of all of your mother-ancestors by celebrating yourself. Even if you've never birthed anyone, you've certainly been a mentor and mother to someone (even if only your pet) so count yourself in in the great lineage of nourisher's, caregivers, and life givers. See their reflection in your smile, walk, and fortitude of being. Be proud to carry their energy and vibrancy forward by loving your self and your life deeply. This continuation is the real celebration of Mother's Day.

Lots of Peace and Love to you,
Shanti

Please Don't Try To Be Happy

5/7/2019

Has anyone ever said “Smile. Be happy!” to you? Did that work… or did it have the opposite effect?

You can’t force yourself to be happy or have a positive outlook, to flip the switch with one feld swoop from Off to On. Positivity is a state of being that’s cultivated, one that’s developed by consistently strengthening your skillful perception of events and emotionally accepting experiences.

Positivity isn’t always easy to access. When you’re feeling depressed, shaky, afraid, angry or worried, positive emotions like happiness, joy, and love can feel like too big of a leap. Instead of feeling bad that you can’t connect to these deep heart emotions, I offer that it’s much easier (and more realistic) to bring in a renewing feeling, one that's a little lighter and more accessible.

For instance, a renewing emotion / feeling sense can arise when you notice the warmth of the sun on your face, listen to birds chirping in the trees, feel the coolness the breath as it comes into your body, or tap into small place of ease somewhere in your realm.

Renewing emotions can be the gift that fills the gap between “negative” and “positive” emotions. They can have you feeling less guilty and shameful for not be so happy all the time…which is actually not a realistic or practical state.

Psychology researcher Barbara Frederickson has actually shown that a 3:1 ratio of positivity to negativity sustains us and keeps life moving in the right direction. Too much is fake (sincerity counts) and not enough keeps us cycling into gloom.

So access those positive emotions if you can but stop trying so hard. It's too much pressure. Instead, turn to renewing more often. What feels grounded and good. What’s a bridge between low and high? What gives you a little lift instead of keeping you down? Renewing emotions and feelings will benefit you greatly and keep you far from depleting states without the “Smile. Be happy!” BS.

What are you feeding your field?

4/23/2019

Every beat of our heart generates electricity (this is why the machine used to monitor our heart is called an electrocardiogram). Whenever electricity is produced, it also creates a magnetic field. Just like with the radio-frequency waves produced by cell phones, these electromagnetic fields transmit encoded information, i.e. my text message shows up thousands of miles away, exactly as I sent. Magnetic fields are transmitters of information.

I’m sure you’ve had the experience of walking into a room and feeling like something was off, even though there weren’t any obvious signals for that. You felt it… then verified it after talking to the person. Conversely, there may be a person in your life that you just naturally gravitate towards, that has you feeling good simply be being in their presence.

We pick up on each other’s energies, known and unknown.

The heart produces the largest source of rhythmic electromagnetic energy in the body, creating a magnetic field that is measurable at least 3 feet away. The brain’s magnetic field, on the other hand, can only be measured 1 inch away. This isn’t to say that the brain is bad but instead to ask us to start thinking more about what’s in our heart. The heart’s magnetic field creates your personal field environment.

Emotions are the driver of our physiology. What we feel - coherence or incoherence - can be seen in the rhythmic patterns of the heart. As a matter of fact, scientists can determine a person’s emotional state with 75% accuracy by simply analyzing the heart’s rhythmic patterns. Way cool!!

So if, through the heart, our emotions create encoded patterns in our magnetic field, what might you be feeding your field environment? What impact do you want to have on the people and places around you? What energies are you producing underneath that smile that might be a bigger truth of your situation?

With mindfulness, you can become more aware and love yourself no matter what so tune in. Check your heart out. Listen deeply. And then make choices based on what’s best with lots of care and love. And keep asking yourself, “What am I feeding my field right now?”

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

April 19th, 2019

4/19/2019

I love that meditation has become so popular and more widely accepted over the past dozen years - sort of like yoga did a few decades ago. And with this popularity comes technology. Nearly everything these days is touched by technology. Should this also apply to meditation?

Chill, Sit Breathe Think, 10% Happier, Headspace, Insight Timer, Calm,… so many apps. What to do about them? Which one to choose?

As I shared with my current Mindfulness & Meditation class, meditation apps serve a purpose but they are far from the end-all-be-all. They are a great on-the-go source of guidance into meditation, especially if you’re in a funk and having a hard time adjusting yourself to calm on your own. Taking a mini meditation break through the day, adding some guided visualization of instructed embodiment, is also good.

Meditation apps are a great tool - like a cooking class instructor. To cook a great meal on your own, though, is really your end goal. Yes, become familiar with the basic ingredients and try different techniques on for taste but then you’ve got to go on your own and cook your own meal.

Meditation is about becoming authentically aware and awake to your life. It’s spending time getting to know and being your best friend. If someone’s guiding you all the time, you miss out on your particular path, pieces that you wouldn’t otherwise recognize or come in contact with amidst the guidance. The quiet of the mind and the opening of the heart comes from developing a personal relationship with yourself. Sitting on your cushion or chair, how can you know yourself more deeply, get comfortable with difficulty, bring acceptance to that which you don’t like, appreciate those things you love even more? How can you enjoy just Being you?

What happens on the cushion / seat is a microcosm of what happens in your life. If open and accepting presence are what you’re developing in meditation, this translates to the same in your day to day interactions.

Getting to know your best friend doesn’t happen with depth if someone else is whispering in your ear. Sure, it’s great to have supportive connections but true personal health and wellness comes from you doing the work. But not to worry… it’s OK to sprinkle the spice of the apps into your meal. Just don’t make them your primary ingredient.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti