Blog - 8 limbs Holistic Health, LLC

Simple, Easy Grace

11/19/2018

As you sit with friends and family around the Thanksgiving table this Thursday, most likely it will begin with a grace of some sort; a recitation of a prayer, a gratitude for the food and friends, a heartfelt recognition of all that you've been blessed with, even if it's only this plateful of food.

Saying grace before a meal has been a long-standing practice for most families although, to be honest, many have strayed since the invention of the TV dinner. If it's been missing at your table, perhaps it's a great time to make it a regular part of your meal process, just like setting the table and serving the food.

Saying grace and offering blessings doesn't have to be a religious act but simply an expression of gratitude and appreciation. So many conditions have come together for the food to be on your plate - not just the cooking and shopping but all the work that the farmer did, the earth, the sky and the sun. When you look deeply, there’s a great fortune there.

Eating the food provides nutrients and minerals, essential components of energy for your body to do you all the miraculous things you do. You're fueling your tank. Make it healthy, non-GMO food for super power.

You can also continue the appreciation for the food by eating slowly and with curiosity. Really experience what’s there. What does this really taste like? How do the textures change? Can you feel your body receiving the food, noticing fullness approaching?

This mindful view of your food, with grace and appreciation at the beginning, during, and end, can add a wonderful dynamic to your relationship with your plate and how you're truly fed. Perhaps re-initiate an offering of grace at meal time. Make it a regular practice for a week or so and see how this mindful ingredient adds lots of flavor and spice to an otherwise standard experience.

Love and Peace to you,
Shanti

Music Makes It More Than Fine

11/12/2018

Did you ever have a really rotten day and, on your way home, you slip in a CD of your favorite tunes and "crank it up to crank it out"? Within minutes of singing out loud, drumming on the steering wheel, grooving in your seat, and whatever else moves you, all your stress goes away. "Bye-bye mess back at the office! I've got boogie in my bones." Yes!!

Music has such capacity to change our mood and switch our outlook... and all within seconds. How fantastic is that!

For as long as I can remember, I've had native flute music playing in the background as I work in my office. One particular CD was always dialed in... over and over. I never got sick of it. I wasn't really paying attention to the music itself but it was there, creating a soothing space as I went about my day.

Then one day, the CD portion of my Bose system broke. Total bummer. (really sad face)

After a few days, I noticed an interesting thing. There was an edge to my energy. I was a bit more easily agitated and frustrated for really no reason at all... except the calming melodies enveloping my background space were no longer there.

Unfortunately my Bose system is still broken (and if anyone has one and never uses the CD portion, I'm happy to compensate and trade with you) with my work-around now being listening to this music on my iTunes. Edges be gone!

This week, experiment yourself and try different music on. Notice how different styles of music affect your mood; which ones act as mood stabilizers or energizers. This can be a fun thing to do, especially as holiday music is beginning to be pumped into the airways. You want decide what you want to listen to.

Peace to you,
Shanti

P.S. Lyrics to "More Than Fine" by Switchfoot... a favorite song to start the day and a powerful proclamation that I'm in charge of my life. When I wake in the morning
I want to blow it into pieces
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

When I'm up with the sunrise
I want more than just blue skies
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now
I'm not giving up, giving up, not backing down
More than fine, more than bent on getting by
More than fine, more than just ok

When I'm lit with the sunshine
I want more than just a good time
I want more than just ok, more than just ok

I'm not giving up, giving up, not giving up now
I'm not giving up, giving up, I'm not selling out
More than fine, more than bent on getting by
More than fine, more than just ok...

How Wide Does Your Pendulum Swing?

9/22/2018

A pendulum swings wide and equal to each side. Drifting from the core center, a tremendous amount of energy can be expended when we are at either extreme. And while momentum can keep things going in either direction, symbolically, extremes can be dangerous… at the very least highly disruptive.

The Middle Way, balance in all things, helps to regulate energies and create ease and harmony. There is a smooth continuum when we swing not far from our center point. The energy that we use to produce results is directed and efficient as we're not engaged in the struggle of opposites and discursiveness in getting things done, rambling from one course to another. This is true for all aspects of our life.

Take your relationship with food, for example. If you're in balance, you’ll eat when your body tells you it’s time to eat (not by the clock), when you receive signals that more energy is needed. In this way, you’ll more easily maintain health. To do otherwise is to waste lots of energy eating too much, too little, or the wrong foods. Maintaining this balance, this Middle Way, with food is key to success and happiness.

As the energy of summer starts to wind down, you may notice a tendency to speed up in anticipation and preparation for winter: house projects saying "Now or never!", harvest collection, outdoor fairs and fun, catching up with summer events that were missed. There's a rush to complete and a not-so-subtle energy of extreme. While this vibrant energy can feel fantastic and have you feeling alive, it can also put you in overdrive and have your pendulum swinging wide, keeping you out of balance.

So as the next month of serious change takes shape, as best you can, try to avoid the rush-to-complete energy, the one that adds pressure to what could otherwise be an enjoyable situation. Instead, let yourself enjoy the transition that’s naturally coming with the change of season. Sleep late (easy to do with the delayed sunrise), stroll the garden often to notice the changes happening daily, breathe deep and often, and giggle in amusement as you change your clothes for the third time in one day trying to get it "just right" with the changing weather conditions. Stay centered and balanced in the Middle Way, enjoying your gentle pendulum swing.

Peace,
Shanti

Too Much Focus... Or Is It Just Lack Of Attention?

9/14/2018

Twice a day my dog Suki and I take a walk... exercise for me and release for her. For 18 and 3.5 years respectively it’s been the same route through the neighborhood. With such regularity, it’s really easy to get into “the zone”… Mommy and dog synchronizing steps and getting their groove on, at least until there’s something really exciting to sniff or stopping because it's time “to go”.

Last week was no different… until it happened.

Moseying along the other morning, the end of our 2.5 mile walk, with me looking forward to my second cup of coffee as I caught sight of our house, a sudden and jolting squish, squish!! Uck! All six of our feet instantly and completely submerged, sneakers soaked through to the socks, back of legs splattered, furry paws covered in this grey gritty matter… concrete.

WTH! Where did this come from?!

You see, the neighborhood has been going through a redevelopment since mid spring: roads ripped down to bare bones, sidewalks demolished or created (we have a lot of non-sidewalk areas), drainage systems removed and replaced, curbs being added where there were once none. Gigantic pieces of roadway equipment are spewed about everywhere, filling the streets like special edition Tonka trucks that a giant alien child forgot to put away.

For weeks, a little box has been laid out at my street corner: a wooden frame surrounding a shallow pit Suki could hop in and out of like a pony in a jumping competition. Granted, a big orange cone stood in front of it to warn passerbys of the work-in-progress but the area itself was empty and, after a few weeks, navigation became a habit.

On this particular morning, unbeknownst to us when we left the house, the worker-dude had just enough time to come by and fill this area with fresh, warm concrete. Being deeply focused in my walking zone, we charged right through into what we expected was an empty pit, not a mucky mess. The gritty splatter woke us up. What a mess we made.

All of this is a perfect example of how easy it is to concentrate so deeply on one thing that you become oblivious to the messages of change around you. Even with activities or attitudes that are beneficial, it's important to pull your head up every now and again to reassess and evaluate. Whether it's a work project that you're managing or a love relationship you're in, don't assume that things around you remain the same. Life changes when we're looking at it and when we're not looking at it. So stay focused and directed with your attention on those things that are positive and beneficial but don't disregard the changes around you that require adjustments.
And, by the way, later on our evening walk I noticed that all of the newly concreted street corners were safely wrapped with, not only orange cones, but also sticks and warning tape. Oblivious, in-the-zone people everywhere, were grateful.

Peace to you,
Shanti

Don’t Look at Obstacles Blocking Your Path

9/7/2018

I’ve been doing a lot of biking this summer - over 450 miles so far - and have luckily had only one incident of road rash. A graceful glide to the earth, played out in slow motion, I was going along a gravel-filled back road when my tire hit the edge of rock and twisted my bike down one way while I fell the other way. Half my body covered in dirt, lower leg scraped of skin, a still-tender injury to my knee but, overall, it could’ve been a lot worse.
   I notice when I ride now that I’m much more aware of the rocks on the ground. With all the recent rain pushing things into the streets, rocks seem to be scattered everywhere. It’s a funny thing that happens to me when I see one in front of me, though. Instead of my front tire avoiding it, there’s an unconscious swerve towards the rock. At the last minute I have to wake my brain and body up to steer away and avoid another crash.
   Interestingly, if I keep my focus on the empty space that surrounds the rock on the road, my bike automatically maneuvers there. It doesn’t take any extra energy or directed thought - it just happens - and gives me a very successful ride.
   This is similar to what can happen as you’re going about your day. You’re focused on going from A to Z, solving problems and taking corrective action. At the same time, though, there’s a part of your brain that’s guarding against issues that you know might impede your progress. The rationale is that, by keeping an eye on the known problems, you’ll end up avoiding them. The brain is wired to search out potential harm so this safety feature comes on-line without much thought.
The reality, though, is that whatever you’re focusing on is where you’re going to go.Even if it’s not really where you want to go, if you’re looking there, you're headed towards it… not the best scenario and can lead to lots of complications and duplicity in both life and work product.
It takes practice to keep your focus on what you do want and let go of what you don’t want. Building this strength in attention, similar to what happens in meditation, requires that you keep steering yourself back to what you want, where you want to be, and what's working well.
Instead of looking at the objects blocking your path to success (whatever your success looks like, even if it’s just laundry), shift your focus to the open space where potential and possibilities lie, where it’s going well, and where you’re able to take good action (aka the space in between the rocks). Let the obstacles go to the side of the road.
Questions for you then... What are the rocks in your life that you no longer want to come in contact with? How are you steering your life so they don’t keep incrementally popping up and so that what you do want paves the road ahead for you?
If you’re finding it difficult to steer or navigate your course, give me a shout and we’ll come up with some ways that will have your ride a lot easier, smoother, and fun. Enough wasting your energy on things you don’t want. Let’s have your life filled with things that make you sing.

Peace and Love,
Shanti

Where’s your determination taking you?

7/19/2018

Determination, as defined by meditation teacher Sylvia Boorstein, is “the decisive energy of a moment of absolute resolve”. I love the “absolute resolve” portion of this definition since it really speaks to the quality of energy needed to be determined about something. It’s not wishy washy or sorta-kinda or even if-everything-lines-up-I-will energy. It’s steadfast, pronounced, and gonna-happen-no-matter-what energy. This is the energy of creation and real change.
Determination is the perfect word to describe my energy these past few months. I’ve been completing my book Everyday Ease: Mindfully Moving from Burnout to Balance and OMG what a process… not the concept or the content but the nitty gritty editing, formatting, more editing, and fonting. I can’t tell you how many hours I spent selecting and dreaming about fonts. Really.
Every open space I had in my schedule would be used to do more work on the book, having faith that consistently taking one step after another within this huge process would result in something I was proud to share with the world. There were days I thought it would never end, feeling like I was birthing my fourth child. “I just want this thing done!” like in the final trimester. Other days would flow and be so easy and yet others would cause me to shed tears and feel completely exasperated. Yet I always kept the faith… and kept going.
I’m proud as a new birth mother to tell you that, sans one final review after a few days of rest and then off to publish, Everyday Ease is done!!! Hallelujah!!!
In the meantime, I’m happy-happy with a strong sense of pride and appreciation for my level of determination. A lot of other things have been happening in my life these past few months yet I’ve been able to harness my focus and attention from some significantly disruptive events to land on something that feels good and feeds my vital energy.
Turning now to ask you, what sort of things are you offering the energy of determination in your life? What’s pushing you forward in a positive, hopeful, and passionate way? With the last half of summer still fresh and available, are there house or work projects that you’re excited and energized about? The sense of accomplishment you’ll feel in creating something previously barren will give you great confidence so look around and go forth. Use your determined energy and resourcefulness for something that you love.

Peace to you,
Shanti

Be yourself. Speak your truth. You’ll be fine.

7/13/2018

How often have you shied away from sharing what was true for you in fear of being judged, disappointing someone else, or wanting to fit in? It could be a situation of no longer feeling like going to a pre-planned event, giving feedback on a report that wasn’t completed to standard, or what to do with a comment someone made that you didn’t like. If you’re like every human I know, this hesitancy to share your truth and what’s real for you has happened more than once.

But what does this non-sharing of your truth get you?

An ucky pit in your stomach, a nagging feeling of regret, feeling like you aren’t that important, or perhaps being super critical of yourself. You may end up doing things you wouldn’t normally do, feeling a little ashamed or disappointed in yourself. And perhaps other times you actively decide to let it go, highlighting the needs of the other person.

When you stop sharing your personal truth with others on a consistent basis, though, you get lost. You become a shell of something that isn’t who you are, picking up ideas and values that might not really match your own. Things might get so mixed up that eventually you don’t even know who you are or what you believe in.

There’s a high level of personal respect in sharing your truth. When you voice your opinion, your ideas, your point of view, you’re saying “Hey, this is me. I’m important and I want to share myself with you.”

It helps others get to know the uniqueness and beauty of who you really are so they can see past the basic framework. It helps them to value you more and understand your needs and desires… and gives them the opportunity to decide for themselves what they’ll do with it all. They can make decisions based upon a higher level of reality instead making decisions based on misinformation or half truths.

I’ve been in several situations where the other didn’t share their truth and it was extremely destructive. Based upon actions and words, I thought one thing, eventually finding out something completely different… usually after an investment of time, energy, and even heart. Situations like this are painful and not necessary. They don’t honor any of the relationships involved, especially the one with ourselves.

Another thing about sharing our truth is that, without knowing it, you might inspire others to think in ways they’ve never thought of before. They may come to have a totally different perspective and become excited about a new way of thinking. And even if they don’t agree with your truth, anyone who cares will be grateful for your honesty.

Truth that comes from your heart is deeply connected to your core essence. When you share it in a kind and neutral “this is it” way, with the intention of healthy connection, others are able to hear it and understand you better. It really keeps the playing field more equitable and real.

So what is your truth and how can you share it kindly with others? And remember…Be yourself. Speak your truth. You’ll be fine.

Peace to you!
Shanti

Even If It's a Hard Truth...

7/2/2018

Have you ever struggled making a decision, doubting yourself whether to do 'this' or ‘that’? Of course you have - we all have. So many options, not sure which one to choose. You get all twisted up in forecasting the effect and thinking about the consequences, trying to judge whether it’s worth the effort to change. Perhaps you’re at a crossroad in your life and you’re not sure which way to turn: changing a relationship, moving across country, taking a new assignment or job, getting a pet or a new car. Or perhaps the decision is smaller and simpler like which road to take on the way to work or which activity to focus on during the day.
It’s easy to get mired in the mind’s madness of what to do when you don’t feel sure or secure enough, when confidence or resiliency are low, and when fear of the unknown gets a grip and swirls you around like a helicopter in distress. And the more time you spend hedging making the decision, the more convoluted the “right” answer becomes. The inability to make a clear decision can have pretty big consequences - which is one of the reasons some decisions are so hard to make. You don’t want to make a mistake. You want to do the right thing. You want things to be smooth and easy.
What you forget during these indecisive times is that you’re energetically connected to your higher Source energy. Call it what you will - Intuition, Spirit, God, Universe - it’s an all knowing. You can't see it but you can feel it when you tune in enough to listen. Think about how many times you didn’t listen to your gut and then, after wrong action, wish you did.
Hindsight is 20/20 but it doesn’t need to stay that way. You can live more connected and synchronized to Source and thus feel more grounded and centered with what your particular version of right and wrong is.
Tapping into this can begin with something as simple as taking a few moments to get quiet, listen, and feel. To create the space to listen and feel, you’ll first need to settle the energy of the body and especially the mind. The mind is the biggest disconnector to Source - it takes you on trips all across the world but skips this one sacred place.
When you’re calm and ready, take one potential answer and picture that it’s happened, that it has come to be. Then tune in to your wholeness and ask “Am I feeling stronger, more settled, and more complete with this decision? Does it feel right?” Feeling is a key factor here - not thinking. Truthful energy is a feeling sense, not a thinking metric.Perhaps a sigh of relief arrives or a gentle smile on your face. Or perhaps you notice you feel weaker, more agitated, anxious, or confused. This quiet tuning in is like spot-on muscle testing. Your truth keeps you strong. What is not your truth makes you weak.
Your right answers become pretty clear when you create the space for clarity. The trick is to get quiet and calm enough so that you can hear and feel the messages. When you’re wrapped up, everything shuts down or is jammed up in a state of confusion. And once you discover what’s right for you, it’s time to take action, action that is grounded in what’s right for you.
Try this out today, starting with smaller and less consequential decisions. Start tuning into your Source energy, trusting yourself to know what’s right for you.And by the way, this is a loving place. There’s no fighting or discursive thought with Source. It’s grounded energy of truth…. your truth.

Sending you lots of Peace and Love,
Shanti

15 Ways to Keep Those Goals Intact

5/26/2018

We all have goals that we're trying to achieve (especially on Mondays). Depending on the day, it could be as complex as scoping out a system change within your organization or something simpler like how to tackle the housework and still get to the beach. Regardless of how tough your goals are, for a variety of reasons, we oftentimes lose the energy or focus to continue engaging with them.

Recently I spoke to a large organization about sticking with their goals, supporting them in making the best use of their time and energy. Knowing that you're a power person and always doing something, I thought to share 15 of my favorite points with you in the hopes that they keep you inspired and on track.

Have your dreams and desires come from your heart, not your head. Both places are powerful but your heart contains clarity.
Never believe negativity from others. It's your one life, not theirs.
FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real. Those gremlins seem pretty real sometimes but, underneath, they're just stuff we make up to keep us comfortable. Don't believe most of what you think, unless it empowers you forward with a smile on your face. Play with getting out of comfort.
STEP your way to success. Single Task Enhances Progress.
Do something every day towards your goal. Even 10 minutes counts.
Write goals out in the present tense and read them aloud daily = 95% success rate.
Stick with your "Why"... and feel it... daily. Make it part of who you are so there's nothing in you that doubts what you're doing.
When you wake up from your forgetfulness, start again from where you are with no judgment or criticism.
Take periodic breaks to replenish your energies instead of steaming ahead and during yourself out. Just like a car being driven across country, you've got to stop to refuel and let the engine cool off before you go any further.
No path is linear. Appreciate the bumps and side trips. Keep moving.
Tap into experts, those who've traveled before you. Learn from their mistakes. They're usually always happy to share.
Stay excited, get support, and share your goals and your plan with others. This will help to keep you accountable (and I'm happy to do that for you gratis).
Celebrate your successes daily, at minimum weekly.
Whatever your heart is seeking, honor that. Even if it's the weirdest thing ever, if it keeps showing up, it's a call from destiny.
Trust yourself and the Universe to support you.

Want more for yourself or a training designed specifically for your organization? Send me a quick note and let's talk.

Peace,
Shanti

Honey, Can We talk?

5/3/2018

Communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship but sometimes it's the hardest thing to do, especially when the days are filled with busyness going in many divergent directions. It's a miracle sometimes and that 50% of marriages survive.

Since we’re not really taught how to effectively communicate in loving relationships, I thought to ask one particular successful couple I know, Mike and Fran. They're in their mid 30s, have a growing family of three, and have known each other since high school. “What's your secret relationship sauce? How do you keep it all together between family, home, work, and the community activities you support?”

It was pretty easy for Mike and Fran to answer. Mindful communication; purposeful connection, deep listening, gratitude offering, a desire to learn and be understood. They frequently stop to check in with each other beyond the householder duties and activities, supporting one another on an emotional level. Knowing that each day is different, curiosity versus assumption is the viewpoint they take.

Here's what they offered as some guidelines for healthy partner communication:

Set up a regular day and time (even a time everyday) where you won't be disturbed by others or feel rushed. No kids or cell phones.
Bring some flowers, a candle, or something beautiful to the setting, creating a space that is warm and inviting.
Spend a few quiet minutes just being together, letting the day go, breathing to settle into the moment. Holding hands or touching is wonderful.

Each person then takes a turn having “the floor” with uninterrupted time for the following:

The Sharer shares 2-3 things they appreciate and are grateful for about the other; remembrances of the things they did or said that week that were positive and nurturing. The Receiver receives these gifts of appreciation.
The Sharer shares one thing that was found to not feel as nurturing; perhaps an unskillful remark, action, or temperament. While we can often “let the little things go”, sometimes they fester in the background. Reconciling them with understanding has them being fully “let go”. Of importance with this sharing is that it’s communicated in a way that doesn’t instigate blame or wrongness but rather using I statements. “I felt unappreciated when your dirty clothes were all over the bedroom floor after I spent 3 hours cleaning the house.” (Note this is different than “You’re such a slob!”) The Receiver listens deeply to what is being shared without defensiveness or reactivity, trying to understand the other’s perspective.
The Sharer then requests support so that the suffering can be lessened or relieved. “It would really help me if you could put the dirty clothes in the hamper so that we can enjoy the clean house together. I know you want to honor my efforts and this would help me greatly.”
With a calm body and mind, the Receiver expresses gratitude for the sharing, curiosity if needing to learn more, and whatever they're able to support in the way of correction, understanding, or insights.
When the sharing is complete, a few words of gratitude are expressed before they switch roles.

Mike and Fran agree that this method of communication is not as easy in the beginning but, once the trusting connection is made, slights and misunderstandings become a lot less intense. They feel truly supported in their partnership. Time and energy well spent, on a regular basis, has enabled their relationship to thrive.

(This article initially appeared in Around Concord Magazine, Spring 2018 issue.)

Enjoy! Peace and Love,
Shanti