I'm sending you and all of your loves ones many blessings for continued health and safety. I'm here for you and what you may need. Just reach out by replying to this message and let's talk. I have SO many tools to support you in reducing, managing, and even thriving with stress. Let me be a resource!​

Every day you're facing new and unknown challenges from a variety of different sources and directions. With all of the changes, it's easy to feel disheveled and anxious. Navigating those emotions, and the effects they create, takes diligence and practice. In the beginning, it can take the strength of heart to stay in the heart.

As such, I thought you might enjoy a peaceful pause with this Come to Calm & Easy ocean meditation. The visual is from Jenness Beach in Rye this past weekend. It was very calming and peaceful to take in the negative ions from the ocean, to look out over the expanse and feel Oneness, and to gaze upon the beautiful and amazing blue sky that is bright and fresh. Enjoy!... and please share.
I'm also sending along a Ted Talk from Amy Cuddy. She shares the research around the Power Pose and how we can shift from a position of weakness to strength simply by standing in Superwoman or Superman pose for two minutes. It decreases our cortisol level and increases testosterone, offering a sense of empowerment, control, and strength to do what's right and needed. Enjoy this as well.

Peace and Love to you!
Shanti

Want some big wins every day? Pause periodically and check in with your WIN - What’s Important Now.  
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We all want more time. How to not fritter the precious moments on things that don’t really matter and just lead you down a path covered in shiny objects that are costly to productivity and skillful attention?

We all want to feel accomplished. How to stick with the priorities, stay energized, and not use a boat-load of motivation and willpower to get things done?

We all want the feeling of flow. How to adapt easily, instead of resisting hard, to the changes that invariably take place throughout the day?

You got it! By keep WINning.

Instead of trying to cram the day into the way you think it should go (aka creating more stress and tension), take a moment to pause so you can re-assess and decide what the next most important thing to attend to is. Oftentimes it’s not what you had initially planned but it does keep you ahead of the change game.

I check in with my WIN every time I’m done with a deep work block, complete a task or set of emails / phone calls, come back to my desk, or take a mini ultradian body break. It makes a huge difference!

Try it on and see how you can win with your WIN.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

Just like you, I’ve got a ton of things that need my attention through the day. There are a lot of pieces to keeping a business prosperous and, if I’m not careful, shiny objects can’t tantalize my attention away from what’s really important. I want, and need, to stay focused.
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My tendency, though, is to be a pendulum swinger, going from being FULL ON for days and then, invariably, swinging in the other direction and feeling fizzled out. I swing from 100% to near zero… and then have to energize myself to get going again. This wide swinging is terrible.

Something I’ve been doing for the past year, though, has changed all of this. As much as possible, I work with my ultradian rhythms throughout the day.

I’m sure you’ve heard of circadian rhythms. These are the 24 hour cycles we go through each day that help us with sleep-awake cycles. They’re connected to our hormonal system, specific brain activity, cell regeneration, and other biological processes.

Ultradian rhythms are smaller chunks - typically 90 minutes on then 20 minutes off. During the 90 minutes, we can give it our all and be really energized and focused. After that, though, we need to take a rest of at least 20 minutes, doing something that relaxes our body and brain or changes the energy of what we were doing before. AKA, this means not scrolling on-line, staying seated, or trying to hammer out “one more thing” even if it’s a small task. Be ALL IN and then be ALL OFF.

Personally, most of the day I break this 90 minutes down even further into 30 minute cycles, giving myself a 2-5 minute break in between. I do a few simple stretches, 10 deep breaths, bio break, or check in with my WIN (more on that next week). This helps me stay refreshed and energized, without the end-of-day-dead-tired. And when I do the bigger 20 minutes break, I take a walk, do some jigsaw puzzle, sit in the sun and play ball with Suki, meditate, or take a nap.

And speaking of napping: Yes, yes, yes do it… but not more than 30 minutes. Anything beyond the cat nap situation will begin the 90 minute sleep cycle… which is why it can take hours to “wake up” after a longer nap.

Try working with ultradian rhythms this week and see how your day flows and energy stays more balanced. Again, it’s all about experimenting with optimizing our lives.

Sending you lots of Peace,
Shanti

After finishing my 10 month Optimize Coaching program in December, I was on fire. My confidence was huge, I was feeling courageous, I was putting myself out there in ways I haven't done in a while (which felt really good), and my creative juices were flowing.
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Getting through the weird mid-week holidays and into January, this awesomeness continued. And then I faced something I didn't want to do but previously committed myself to. Even though I was getting a huge nag to change the committed plan, I stuck with it… but it cost me a lot of energy and willpower and totally took me out of flow. And then I got sick, really sick. Laid up in bed for with the flu for five days, recovery still slowly lingering.

During the time that I was sick, there was no energy available to entertain my mind. It was all I could do to maintain awareness of my body, supporting its healing. So I have to smile that the mend begins when the mind comes in… although that is really quite the opposite of what happened. 

Instead of my mind being my champion, it was the most disruptive unhealthy part of me. It was like the gremlins got together while I was “unconscious” for so many days and decided to attack when things started to get better. Every nook and cranny of how bad and wrong and insignificant and unworthy of greatness I might be was busting out at the seams. The flu was nasty enough but this mindset? How can I be doing this to myself? I'm in the practice of self-love, self-care, and self compassion. Where was it for me?

Of course I didn't have the energy to fight with my mind. It was hard enough trying to walk up and down the stairs. So here I was, face-to-face with the Gremlins of Dark. What to do?

Since I was already laying down, it was natural just to have my gremlins lay down next to me. What are you really trying to say to me? What's your real message? Hopefully somewhere in there you're trying to inspire me… what insights can I draw from your criticisms? What are you hoping that I'll do differently in my life? And who invited you into this room, anyways? Do I want you here? Do I need you here? 

It's easy to get lost in the fear mind, in the old tapes we play, the ones that have been playing for decades about how we're not as good as we think we are and we'll never make it the way we really want to make it. Even after decades of work, we might ask ourselves "is any of that true?"

Laying there with my fear, it was true… from my fear’s perspective. But it wasn't true from my heart’s perspective.

My heart is deeply and directly connected to my basic goodness and the all the ways I want to make this world a better and more loving place. I have so much to offer and, while I’m not always showing up as fully as I’d like, I'm working on it. Every day I head a little bit more in that direction. I help people through my coaching practice, supporting others to connect with their possibilities and worthiness. I share a lot of skills with business organizations throughout the world, helping team members have a little bit more ease and balance in their jam-packed days. And I provide a safe place for people to share themselves, to be seen and heard.

All I can give to my life is a chance, to optimize as best I can every moment that I'm given. Am I 100% “on” all the time? Absolutely not. But identifying more “on” than “off” and celebrating that keeps the spiral moving upward. Sure, the gremlins are going to be right there but maybe they'll be a little bit quieter if they can lay down next me instead of screaming in my face.

Reminders and learnings? Plenty:
1) Honor the inner message of NO.
2) A low-resourced body = a low-resourced mind (more on this next time).
3) Just because you think it certainly doesn't make it true.
4) Emotions are to be understood, not feared.

Peace and Love to you,
Shanti

P.S. You might be wondering why I share these stories of myself so often. Isn't that a backwards thing for a coach to do? Where's the rah-rah and inspiration?  Well, first of all, coaching isn't about being a blind cheerleader. It's about getting real with the ins and outs, the pushes and pulls, that we're presented with on a regular basis. I see my life experience reflective of and rooted in our shared humanity. If I can't be real with my shenanigans, how can I possibly support you to be real with yours? And somewhere within that I hope it's inspiring. Thanks for being in my world.

As I was laying on the floor with my dog Suki the other day, I was looking around at all the stuff in the room. First of all, it's really cool to get a dog’s perspective on life and second, it's pretty interesting what we humans collect.
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Seven and a half years ago I had a fire in my house and lost nearly everything. After rebuilding,  I came back into the house with very few things, determined to keep the space clean and clear. I had been decluttering as the boys had been getting older but it still amazed me how much stuff I had. 

I don't think I have a ton of stuff now but I do notice that it has begun to fill up. There are duplications of many things and other items that I’ve rarely used. How many sets of sheets, hiking boots, jackets, pots and pans, coffee maker pots, or candles do I really need? The initial desire and craving to want something or the awesome feeling that comes with “I scored a great deal!” is great but really, what am I doing with it all? Where’s the value? 

“Stuff” can be a lot to take care of, to keep clean, to keep track of. It can really weigh you down after a while and have the space feeling pretty heavy. Is this why we don’t like to clean the house? And while there may be a sense of being full, too much can also lead to a feeling of emptiness. 

In our consumerism world, we’ve been taught that “things” can make us happy, give us comfort, have us feeling safe and secure. All you have to do is watch a TV ad to dissect the not-so-subliminal messages. Even our brain helps this along as we get a little hit of dopamine every time we click the Buy Now button.

Underneath it all, though, when we truly look, we know that things don’t matter in the scheme of life. No one on their death bed ever wished they spent more time shopping and collecting things. It’s people, relationships, heart-felt connections, and experiences that fill us up. Research shows this as well: nearly 70% of us would prefer a gift of connected experience over a material item (great food for thought as we navigate the “giving month”.)

As I near the time when I don't want to be working as much, it begs me to be more intelligent about what I do with my money resources now and to have my personal financial investments be less diversified into the Stuff and Don’t-Really-Need portion of my portfolio which truly hasn’t given a high return on investment.

Over the next few months, I'm going to be more aware and particular about this resource, making note of the essentials versus the disposable, how I share it with other practitioners, and whether they’re local (Small Business Saturday 11/30) or far away (big box shops). I’m sure this’ll create some amusement as we're heading into the holiday purchasing season and I'm secretly grateful that I don't go ballistic with presents like I used to. That's a saving grace.

A practice might be to put things in the Checkout cart but not hit the Buy Now button for a few days, until the dopamine hit has passed and I can re-assess. Another practice might be to purchase only essentials and what's on the shopping list... which will mean cutting chips and chocolate out of my grab-and-go habit (that will certainly save a lot in many areas of my life). And perhaps not buy a book for at least three months. This would certainly test me for sure! I am a book-aholic, after all. Maybe just use what I have to the fullest and go from there.

So, lots of things to mull over… what to do with the extras and any clutter, how to prevent “the fill” from growing, how to enjoy life without the necessity of so many things, and finding spaciousness in simplicity. Yay! What a treat it is to experiment and play with habits of being. 
Peace,
Shanti

Our life is lived in the mundane. Over half of what we do every single day is out of habit, from brushing our teeth to putting on our shoes on to driving to work. Additionally, research has shown that 47% of the time we're not tuned in or present to what we're doing. Our mind is somewhere else… and usually not on a happy thing.
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I find so often that we have this need and desire, this striving, for a sense of happiness and joy. With the complexity in speed of the world these days, it seems to be harder and harder to navigate the pathway to peace, ease, and contentment. We search outside of ourselves in multi-directions for that connection to the Source that’s going to have our light shine bright inside.

While we're busy looking for that joy and happiness outside, though, there are so many precious moments that are available to us in the simple things that we do every single day. We can miss many of the gifts that exist in the mundane.

We complain about our coworkers. We can't stand the slow driver in front of us. We may grunt inside when our kids or parents ask us to do one more thing. And that dinner we have to make? It can feel like a hassle to feed our family sometimes.

How beautiful all of these things are, though. Our coworkers help us manage the bigger workload, allowing us to keep our mission-focused energy. That slow driver in front of us… really helpful when there's a cop around the corner ready to give out a speeding ticket. Kids and parents… this is what we live for. They're so precious in our lives and we’d miss them dearly if they weren’t here. And super hooray yay that there's food in the house and that we can come together to eat and share a meal!

Much of how our day takes shape is determined by how we perceive it. Our view dictates how we see the world and engage with it. Sure, there's a lot in life that just needs to be done. We can say no to things, though, and that's fine (it might even be beneficial) but for those things that we say yes to, let’s say a resounding YES. Let’s say YES in our attitude, demeanor, tone of voice and language, actions and behavior. This is how true nobility and heroism happens with the details of our lives.

Peace and Love,
Shanti